Okay, now that J.C.V.D. has polished Van Damme’s plaque in the action hero hall of fame I can’t keep running from the inevitable, it’s time to go back and watch those early Van Damme pictures I’ve always ignored. I’ve already seen NO RETREAT, NO SURRENDER, his first major role, so I’ll start with BLOODSPORT, his first starring vehicle.
BLOODSPORT is from Cannon, and it’s very much in the vein (get it, vein, BLOODSPORT) as other Cannon chopsocky pictures like AMERICAN NINJA and ENTER THE NINJA, or other ’80s chopsocky movies like THE PERFECT WEAPON. These are stories of goofy white dudes mentored by Asians to take on ancient traditions and become great warriors. They lack charisma, presence and acting ability but are good at martial arts (or at faking them in the case of Michael Dudikoff). In this one there’s not an evil villain to vanquish, just kind of an asshole who’s the one to beat in honorable competition. He’s played by Bolo Yeung of CHINESE HERCULES and ENTER THE DRAGON fame, so he’s mainly a bad guy because of his muscles and his facial expressions:

But Van Damme shows that he is a formidable foe by actually topping Bolo’s insane facial expressions. Without these faces it’s possible Van Damme would’ve never caught on more than, say, Jeff Speakman. I mean check this out:

That’s serious. That goofball there is Van Damme’s character Frank Dux (”like ‘put up your dukes’”), apparently based on a real guy. He’s a soldier for the U.S. who sneaks off to Hong Kong to compete in the Kumite, the legendary secret underground fighting tournament thing. He is pursued by 2 FBI agents (one of them played by Ghost Dog himself, Forest Whitaker) but not to bust him for going AWOL – they just don’t want him to enter the Kumite because he’s so awesome it would be a shame if he got hurt. Also there’s a gal with a bad perm who wants to have sex with him and write an inside story about the Kumite (she succeeds at both [also it shows Van Damme's ass {SPOILER}]). Meanwhile he has flashbacks where a kid playing Van Damme (accent and all) sneaks into a house to mess with somebody’s samurai sword. He gets caught and leaves without a sword but with a new best friend and a sensei. (more…)