I don’t know why I never got around to seeing the THE CROW sequel from the director of SIX-STRING SAMURAI. Always was curious. Still took me 19 years. Lance Mungia’s THE CROW: WICKED PRAYER, just like the previous one, was meant for theaters, but I think it only played somewhere around here? Wiki(dprayer)pedia says its theatrical run was only in Seattle and only for one week, and I do remember seeing an ad for it and being confused, but I was thinking it was in Eastern Washington. Anyway, I didn’t go.
Two Halloweens ago we discussed Tobe Hooper’s first masterpiece. This is his second. He didn’t even want to direct it at first, sort of got pushed into it, but damn did he rally. In many ways THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2 is the Tobe Hooperest movie ever made.
I don’t blame you if you’re skeptical during the opening scene where two obnoxious “senior boys at Wheeler High” calling themselves “Buzz and Rick the Prick” drunkenly drive a Porsche, fire guns, and harass the K-OKLA request line until they receive a drive-by chainsawing on a bridge that must’ve been built by the same people who made that endless runway from the climactic chase in FURIOUS 6. (read the rest of this shit…)
I gotta confess coming to this one from a place of cinematic ignorance. I’ve seen the original Godard movie, but I don’t remember jack shit about it. I thought it was pretty good, I believe. That’s about all I got. Still, I’m sure less people could tell you anything about the remake than everything about the original. So this makes me smart. (read the rest of this shit…)
These last couple weeks have been tough on my mental facilities. I reviewed that great new “ULTIMATE” edition of the original TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE, I also revisited parts 3 and 4 in that original series, then on Thursday I reviewed the new prequel to the remake. So by that point I’d studied and written about pretty much every angle to the whole Texas Chainsaw deal. You’d think I’d be done with it by now, but there is one final chapter: the one spinoff of the original movie that achieves its own level of True Greatness. I am talking about Tobe Hooper’s 1986 sequel, THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2. It’s been available on DVD for a couple years in a bare bones edition (get it, that is a pun because of all the skeletons they have) but Tuesday it comes out in a much deserved special edition with new commentaries, featurettes and deleted scenes. (read the rest of this shit…)
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Recent commentary and jibber-jabber
JTS on Masters of the Universe (2026): “CJ, just want to chime in and say you’ve made a bunch of great points that I agree with wholeheartedly.…” Jun 10, 07:54
CJ Holden on Masters of the Universe (2026): “KayKay, and even that isn’t a joke-joke, but a “The abusive parent is so clueless about being the villain that…” Jun 10, 05:40
Mr. Majestyk on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I have to disagree that Gunn is still getting the balance right. His last two movies have been off. GUARDIANS…” Jun 10, 04:46
KayKay on Masters of the Universe (2026): ““Nobody cracks a joke when Starlord finds out what his father did” Except that revelation is IMMEDIATELY followed by a…” Jun 10, 03:24
KayKay on Masters of the Universe (2026): ““In the 1980s, filmmakers fully committed to their pulpy nonsense. Then in the 1990s and early 2000s they added snark…” Jun 10, 03:21
Steven E on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Hard agree on the jokes – my reflection is that it shows how hard making a James Gunn film is,…” Jun 10, 00:36
pegsman on Spy Hard: “My way better half was away over the weekend, so I revisited this one. Along with 8 other movies in…” Jun 9, 22:38
CJ Holden on Masters of the Universe (2026): ““When you try to “dig in” to the mythology there is no there there. Who even is Teela or Fisto?”…” Jun 9, 22:21
so-and-so on Masters of the Universe (2026): “between vern’s reviews and the commenters who make up this site i am never left wanting for context before i…” Jun 9, 20:42
Curt on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Speaking of Kevin Smith, today I was listening to the most recent episode of his Fatman Beyond podcast, which he…” Jun 9, 19:58
Mr. Majestyk on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I’m glad you brought that up, because it gives me the chance to come clean: I really liked PLAY DIRTY.…” Jun 9, 19:02
VERN on Masters of the Universe (2026): “For those who have a soft spot for He-Man, I really recommend trying Masters of the Universe: Revelation, the animated…” Jun 9, 18:55
VERN on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Majestyk – I don’t have room for any beef with Shane Black that’s not Parker related. (You might be right…” Jun 9, 18:38
Crudnasty on Masters of the Universe (2026): “Are She-Ra and Mumm-Ra related? Was Lion-O originally from Eternia and that’s why he’s named like Fisto and Orko?” Jun 9, 15:35
Peter Campbell on Masters of the Universe (2026): “I really enjoyed this film. The jokes didn’t bother me at all as I am in no way a He-man…” Jun 9, 15:04