DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK is a classed-up remake of an old ’70s TV movie. The director is a rookie friend of the internet named Troy Nixey, but it was produced and written by none other than Guillermo del Toro (in collaboration with his MIMIC co-writer Matthew Robbins).
The tone is completely serious, but all in fun. It’s not trying to punish you, like a Rob Zombie movie, but it is trying to make you wince and feel sympathy pain. That’s why the opening scene is (SPOILER) an old man crying and apologizing as he chisels out his maid’s front teeth. After that you know the movie is boss so you better just shut the fuck up and do what it says. (read the rest of this shit…)
But this one’s not about the Sami people of Finnmark being invaded by the Tchudes, it’s about Native Americans being invaded by vikings. The idea is that vikings could’ve set up shop here centuries before Columbus, and this is the legend of why they didn’t. (read the rest of this shit…)
PATHFINDER is a very simple Norwegian adventure movie about a kid whose village is invaded. It’s presented as a story that’s been passed down from generation to generation, and it does have that feel of a legend or a folk tale.
I’ve never seen a movie about a culture like this. They’re white people with funny beards and mustaches who wear white fur clothes and hats. They live in tents to protect them from the snow. They hunt on skis using bows and arrows (bow and arroweses?). Reindeer pull their sleds. Holy shit, this must be how Santa Claus grew up! This is like a hood movie to Santa Claus. (read the rest of this shit…)
No man, I don’t got a problem. I just watch Michael Bay movies recreationally. I don’t gotta watch them when I wake up or nothin. It’s just every once in a while. I only watched PEARL HARBOR ’cause I was doing all the summer of 2001 movies. And TRANSFORMERS 3 because I thought it would be funny. Then people said I should watch this one. It’s not a big deal, man. That’s not that many. You don’t know what you’re talking about.
I can’t really think of a compelling reason why anybody should see SEASON OF THE WITCH, but it’s way more watchable than I expected. The trailers were dreary and cheap looking, it didn’t look like there was anything very original or exciting about it, it’s from the director of GONE IN 60 SECONDS (remake), and then I think it got delayed but I can’t really prove it because nobody was waiting for it to come out so who would remember? (read the rest of this shit…)
NEXT is a 2007 Nicolas Cage sci-fi vehicle from director Lee Tamahori (ONCE WERE WARRIORS, xXx: STATE OF THE UNION). I finally got to it because I saw that KILL THE IRISHMAN movie and liked it enough to want to look up what else Jonathan Hensleigh has been up to. He’s credited as a writer on this along with Gary Goldman (BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA, TOTAL RECALL, NAVY SEALS) and Paul Bernbaum (Riptide, The A-Team, 21 Jump Street, etc.). I got a hunch which one was the primary visionary behind this, but I’m not gonna say it. (read the rest of this shit…)
WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE is a little low budget cannibal movie put out in ’07 by Dimension Extreme. That’s the division of Dimension Films that puts out independent or foreign horror movies they buy the rights to. They’re extreme so I believe that means they’re like other Dimension movies except they wear backwards hats and ride snowboards. I think ROGUE is the only movie released by them that I saw and liked alot, but I’ve heard good things about INSIDE and TEETH.
This one didn’t get much attention other than a little controversy when rumors spread that it was a remake of CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST. Writer/director Jonathan Hensleigh got mad and claimed otherwise in interviews, but on the commentary track he calls what he said “unfortunate” and admits that CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST was “obviously” a huge influence. (read the rest of this shit…)
SUPER is the landmark thirty-seventh movie about “what if somebody really tried to be a super hero?” But this one was made by James Gunn, the Troma guy turned SCOOBY DOO screenwriter who got some cred when he wrote the DAWN OF THE DEAD remake and then directed SLITHER. Looks like he’s had trouble getting anything off the ground since then (I guess the suits didn’t go for his take on Pepe Le Pew) so he made this one independently like he used to do, but maybe with some more skills and connections he’s made in the big leagues. For example the bit part of the lady at the pet store is played by Linda Cardellini from E.R., because she was Velma in SCOOBY DOO. (That was weird, I thought that character would come back or something, but no. She’s just a pet store lady.) (read the rest of this shit…)
BANKGKOK KNOCKOUT is the name of the latest cinematic knee to the skull from those crazy fuckin Thai stunt people – the guys with the amazingly acrobatic, bone-crunching martial arts, the unbelievable falls and vehicle hits, the guys who get knocked off of trucks or hit by motorcycles for real, and make all the stunt people in every other country look like total sissies. Here in the U.S., Magnet Films will release it on DVD August 30th under the title “BKO: BANGKOK KNOCKOUT,” which stands for “BANGKOK KNOCKOUT: BANGKOK KNOCKOUT.” It’s directed by Panna Rittikrai, who’s had a hand in pretty much all of the modern Thai action classics. He was director of BORN TO FIGHT and ONG BAK 2-3 (taking over after Tony Jaa left), and choregrapher for ONG BAK, TOM-YUM-GOONG/THE PROTECTOR and CHOCOLATE. He was Jaa’s mentor and founder of the Muay Thai Stunt team. He’s pretty much the godfather of this shit. (read the rest of this shit…)
When I was leaving ATTACK THE BLOCK I noticed the poster for SUPER 8 hanging outside the theater. I guess it’s pretty obvious, but until I saw that it hadn’t occurred to me that they’re two really different versions of a similar idea: a group of kids save their neighborhood from an alien invasion. In fact, writer/director Joe Cornish says, just like J.J. Abrams did, that he was mostly inspired by the Amblin movies of the ’80s and specifically E.T. (the extra-terrestrial).
That influence is all over the surface of SUPER 8, but ATTACK THE BLOCK has a completely different style. Even though it takes place in modern day London it really makes me think of late ’70s, early ’80s movies about young people in New York City – BEAT STREET, THE WARRIORS, the “Beat It” video. It also put me in mind a little bit of ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 over here on the west coast. The score by a gentleman named Basement Jaxx is a hell of alot closer to John Carpenter than John Williams. (read the rest of this shit…)
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Recent commentary and jibber-jabber
Schmoe Gunn on Apex: “It’s a shame this is Netflix-only. So much art is now hidden in walled gardens built by rentiers who use…” Apr 30, 12:33
BESTIEunlmt on Apex: “No mention of the human jerky connection to Lou Ferrigno’s ‘The Hermit’?” Apr 30, 12:04
dreadguacamole on Fatal Deviation: “Yeah, whoever said this was the worst movie ever made clearly hasn’t seen enough movies, and would never make a…” Apr 30, 10:04
dreadguacamole on Redline (2009): “This movie fucking rules, no other way to put it; Exhuberant is exactly the right word to describe it. It…” Apr 30, 09:35
Max K. on The Christophers: “Yeah, Coel’s prospective take on Bloodsport is still sight unseen maybe the most comedy skit accurate movie thing that’s happened…” Apr 30, 03:04
Birch on Redline (2009): “This really is The anime movie to me. Lots of fun and just absolutely gorgeous. Everyone I have ever shown…” Apr 30, 00:09
so-and-so on They Will Kill You: “thanks for reviewing this, i wouldn’t have heard of it otherwise. i watched Why Don’t You Just Die? back when…” Apr 29, 19:31
Gary Jive on Fatal Deviation: “@The Cosh – I was at the GFT too! Yeah, the movie pretty much sucked but it was an interesting…” Apr 29, 07:27
Martijn on Fatal Deviation: “If you’re looking into first martial arts movies made in… an interesting one might be the Dutch film Fighting Fish…” Apr 28, 23:24
Adam C aka TaumpyTearrs on Fatal Deviation: “Seconding the love for 1900HOTDOG.com and the Dogg Zone podcast. They also did an episode about Trancers 2 right around…” Apr 28, 23:01
Adam C aka TaumpyTearrs on Redline (2009): “I am genuinely jealous you got to experience this on the big screen, the speed and fluidity of the animation…” Apr 28, 21:51
Hammer Time on Fatal Deviation: “Holy crap. You got chocolate in my peanut butter! You got peanut butter in my chocolate. Okay, so Cracked (name-checked…” Apr 28, 21:10
The Cosh on Fatal Deviation: “@Gary I actually saw that at the GFT. The only thing I remember about it was being surprised how young…” Apr 28, 16:26
Gary Jive on Fatal Deviation: “I once worked on The Purifiers – a Scottish kung fu movie. It was basically The Warriors in a futuristic…” Apr 28, 14:04
Stephen on Fatal Deviation: “Vern, I’m here for the Moving Target review if you ever end up doing one. Still feels surreal that Roger…” Apr 28, 14:04
DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK is a classed-up remake of an old ’70s TV movie. The director is a rookie friend of the internet named Troy Nixey, but it was produced and written by none other than Guillermo del Toro (in collaboration with his MIMIC co-writer Matthew Robbins).
PATHFINDER is a very simple Norwegian adventure movie about a kid whose village is invaded. It’s presented as a story that’s been passed down from generation to generation, and it does have that feel of a legend or a folk tale.
No man, I don’t got a problem. I just watch Michael Bay movies recreationally. I don’t gotta watch them when I wake up or nothin. It’s just every once in a while. I only watched 
I can’t really think of a compelling reason why anybody should see SEASON OF THE WITCH, but it’s way more watchable than I expected. The trailers were dreary and cheap looking, it didn’t look like there was anything very original or exciting about it, it’s from the director of GONE IN 60 SECONDS (remake), and then I think it got delayed but I can’t really prove it because nobody was waiting for it to come out so who would remember?
NEXT is a 2007 Nicolas Cage sci-fi vehicle from director Lee Tamahori (ONCE WERE WARRIORS, 
WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE is a little low budget cannibal movie put out in ’07 by Dimension Extreme. That’s the division of Dimension Films that puts out independent or foreign horror movies they buy the rights to. They’re extreme so I believe that means they’re like other Dimension movies except they wear backwards hats and ride snowboards. I think 
SUPER is the landmark thirty-seventh movie about “what if somebody really tried to be a super hero?” But this one was made by James Gunn, the Troma guy turned SCOOBY DOO screenwriter who got some cred when he wrote the DAWN OF THE DEAD remake and then directed SLITHER. Looks like he’s had trouble getting anything off the ground since then (I guess the suits didn’t go for 
BANKGKOK KNOCKOUT is the name of the latest cinematic knee to the skull from those crazy fuckin Thai stunt people – the guys with the amazingly acrobatic, bone-crunching martial arts, the unbelievable falls and vehicle hits, the guys who get knocked off of trucks or hit by motorcycles for real, and make all the stunt people in every other country look like total sissies. Here in the U.S., Magnet Films will release it on DVD August 30th under the title “BKO: BANGKOK KNOCKOUT,” which stands for “BANGKOK KNOCKOUT: BANGKOK KNOCKOUT.” It’s directed by Panna Rittikrai, who’s had a hand in pretty much all of the modern Thai action classics. He was director of BORN TO FIGHT and ONG BAK 2-3 (taking over after Tony Jaa left), and choregrapher for ONG BAK, TOM-YUM-GOONG/THE PROTECTOR and CHOCOLATE. He was Jaa’s mentor and founder of the Muay Thai Stunt team. He’s pretty much the godfather of this shit. 
When I was leaving ATTACK THE BLOCK I noticed the poster for SUPER 8 hanging outside the theater. I guess it’s pretty obvious, but until I saw that it hadn’t occurred to me that they’re two really different versions of a similar idea: a group of kids save their neighborhood from an alien invasion. In fact, writer/director Joe Cornish 
