"CATCH YOU FUCKERS AT A BAD TIME?"

Posts Tagged ‘gangs’

Switchblade Sisters

Thursday, June 25th, 2026

SWITCHBLADE SISTERS is from 1975, but I’m considering it Slam Evil Summer, because it was re-released June 15, 1996, thanks to Quentin Tarantino’s fandom and his label Rolling Thunder Pictures. It’s directed by Jack Hill (SPIDER BABY, COFFY, FOXY BROWN), and it’s his penultimate movie as a director (the last being SORCERESS in 1982).

I did not see this in a theater, I had to wait to rent the VHS, but it must’ve been a great time with the right audience. It starts off so strong with the wah-wah infused theme song “Black Hearted Woman” playing over a documentary-style black and white photo montage of tough ladies in a world of boarded up houses covered in graffiti. Establishing the landscape.

And then it says “Music by MEDUSA”? What kind of badass group is that!? (Apparently it’s frequent Roger Corman composer and lounge music pioneer Les Baxter.) I’m not sure who took the photos, but the credited title designer is Bill Levey, director of BLACKENSTEIN and MONACO FEVER. His IMDb bio says he was childhood friends with James Dean, hung out with Elvis and discovered Patrick Swayze (who he directed in SKATETOWN U.S.A.).

(read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , ,
Posted in Action, Crime, Reviews | No Comments »

Knights of the City

Thursday, February 5th, 2026

KNIGHTS OF THE CITY is an incredible ‘80s b-movie fever dream that’s still only on VHS, and so up my dark, garbage strewn alley that it’s amazing I never knew about it before. Gives me hope for what else could still be out there.

It involves gangs, breakdancing, and a battle of the bands. It was released in 1986, but filmed in 1984, starring and written by Leon Isaac Kennedy, between PENITENTIARYs II and III. He plays Troy, leader of a street gang and also lead singer of a band. I never caught the name of the gang, and they wait until the final act to reveal that the band is called The Royal Rockers. They’re violent tough guys who collect protection money from area businesses, and participate in gang rumbles using canes, bats, chains and switchblades. Their band rehearses in a trashed, graffiti and mannequin filled punk apartment, but their music is danceable synth-based R&B love songs.

The unspecified Florida city’s street culture is like a collision of BREAKIN’ and DEATH WISH 3, so we see endless varieties of sleeveless shirts, headbands, leather jackets, fingerless gloves, sunglasses, studded belts, raised collars, mesh tank tops, berets, wristbands, armbands, camouflage, marching band jackets, New Wave blazers, and many types of mohawks. The villain Carlos (Jeff Moldovan, BLOODSPORT: THE DARK KUMITE), leader of the Mechanics, is introduced wearing a red vest over a red Hawaiian shirt tied up Daisy Duke style. His trademarks are a fedora and a cheap fake mustache cut in two with each half glued to the side of his mouth. When he takes off the fedora it reveals that he too has a mohawk. (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Reviews, Action, Music | 5 Comments »

West Side Story

Tuesday, February 15th, 2022

WEST SIDE STORY – it’s very clear when you see it – is a film by Steven Fucking Spielberg. That’s why I saw it. Usually when I write about a remake of a beloved classic I like to be somewhat knowledgeable about the source material, but this late in the game you’ve had plenty of time to read reviews from people who know the musical or the earlier Robert Wise movie forward and backward, can tell you all the things that Spielberg and screenwriter Tony Kushner (MUNICH, LINCOLN) added, cut, updated, etc., and the significance of those alterations. Or at least from someone who has seen the original. I have not. I would’ve, but Spielberg didn’t direct it.

I don’t really gravitate toward Broadway musical type stuff, but I do have a thing for great filmatism, so this thing knocked me out. As even I kind of knew, it’s the story of two gangs, the Jets (white guys) and the Sharks (proud Puerto Ricans) stubbornly fighting over territory in a dilapidated Manhattan slum that (this part is new, I believe) is on the verge of redevelopment. In the opening, Janusz Kaminski (COOL AS ICE)’s camera hovers over what remains of the neighborhood, climbs up the side of a structure under construction, past a billboard advertising the fancy apartment building and entertainment center it will become (featuring the sort of upper class white people who will inhabit it), then hangs out a while next to the wrecking ball waiting to get the process started. Meanwhile, the percussion section (David Newman [CRITTERS, ROVER DANGERFIELD, CONEHEADS, THE SPIRIT] arranging Leonard Bernstein’s music) playfully percolates like the build up to a heist sequence.

(read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Musical, Reviews | 22 Comments »

HiGH&LOW: The Movie

Tuesday, March 16th, 2021

“Even scumbags like us could change the future!”

I bet some of you are way ahead of me on HiGH&LOW, and some of you will be hearing of it for the first time here. Either way I’m excited for us to talk about it. No, this is not related to the Akira Kurosawa classic, and I’m honestly not sure what the title even means. But it it’s how they’ve labelled what Wikipedia describes as an “action media franchise” that has been going on in Japan since 2015. I never heard peep of it until the always with-it Twitter-er @HeadExposure raved about it in August.

You can check out that thread for an explanation and some clips, but I’ll try to sum up my understanding from having watched one movie so far. It’s kind of a fun challenge – I feel like one of those people trying to wrap their head around the FAST & FURIOUS series or Marvel or Star Wars way after the fact.

I believe it was always planned to turn into a movie series, but the story began on TV with HiGH&LOW: The Story of S.W.O.R.D., which lasted for two seasons. Those characters and storylines continued into this movie, which has since had two sequels, three spin-offs, a TV comedy series spin-off and an anime. (The movies, but not the other stuff, are all available on Netflix.)

The part that’s definitely way beyond my understanding is that it was created by a former pop star called Exile Hiro, from a group called Exile, and many of the gangs in the movie are various boy bands/music acts that are part of “The Exile Tribe,” so they have albums and tours and stuff related to this franchise. It kind of seems like if the Back Street Boys had an extended family like the Wu-Tang Clan except way bigger and then they all learned martial arts and made violent action movies together. Or is it more like if everyone in the FAST & FURIOUS movies did a concert tour together? I don’t know, but to quote Marge Simpson, “Music is none of my business.” (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , ,
Posted in Action, Martial Arts, Music, Reviews | 3 Comments »

We Die Young

Thursday, April 11th, 2019

WE DIE YOUNG is an odd thing: a straight-to-VOD (now on DVD) Jean-Claude Van Damme movie that has some violence and plenty of crime – it opens with a flash-forward to a car chase to assure you of this – but really is kind of an indie drama with Van Damme in supporting character actor mode. The main character is actually Lucas, played by Elijah Rodriguez, who was the kid being pressured into working for the cartel in SICARIO: DAY OF THE SOLDADO. Lucas is a similar character, perhaps crossed with Casper from SIN NOMBRE. He’s a teen without parents raising a younger brother and feeling he has no choice but to be a bicycle riding drug runner for MS-13. In this one, though, he lives in the United States, in a DC neighborhood he says is a 20 minute bike ride from the White House.

Lucas narrates at the beginning as he rides around on his bike, dropping off large quantities of drugs like it’s his paper route. He explains that he works for “the most feared badass in DC,” Rincon (David Castaneda, also in DAY OF THE SOLDADO), who’s introduced threatening some dude who his guys dragged to him in his underwear, tied behind a motorcycle. Rincon manages to be kind of handsome and charismatic despite the crap tattooed all over his face. (I guess he’s allowed to have hair and the M and S aren’t gigantic like Li’l Mago’s in SIN NOMBRE.) (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , ,
Posted in Crime, Drama, Reviews | 4 Comments »

Chi-Raq

Wednesday, December 9th, 2015

tn_chiraqCHI-RAQ (Chicago + Iraq, pronounced shy-rack) is the Spikiest Spike Lee Joint achieved so far. It seems like whatever itch Lee was trying to scratch with those musical numbers in SCHOOL DAZE has been building up for all these years until it exploded onto the screen like that inflating dude in BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA. Lee must’ve woke up one morning and said fuck it, I’m gonna make a movie that’s so Spike Lee it turns into Baz Luhrmann.

Let me tell you a few things about how heightened and crazy this is. It has musical numbers. It has dance numbers. It has a rap number that breaks into a gun fight precipitated by an argument depicted in onscreen text messages. It has an army of women in chastity belts performing a sexy choreographed group lip-synch to “Oh Girl” by the Chi-Lites (maybe my favorite scene). The two rival gangs wear purple and orange, and are called the Trojans and the Cyclops Spartans, whose leader is Cyclops (Wesley Snipes wearing a red-sequined eyepatch). There’s an explicit reference to THE WARRIORS so you know Spike knows what this reminds us of. (Also Luther himself, David Patrick Kelly, is in it.) All of this is presided over by a fourth-wall-breaking narrator played by Samuel L. Jackson wearing fly suits, spinning a cane and reciting toasts and dirty jokes like Dolemite. That’s not just me reading into it, because he’s called Dolmedes and he references Shine and the Signifying Monkey.

Oh, by the way: all of the other characters speak in rhyme also. So that’s pretty different from most movies. (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Comedy/Laffs, Musical, Reviews | 37 Comments »

Angel Town

Monday, November 2nd, 2015

tn_angeltown“Jacques, as long as I’ve known you you’ve been in deep shit. I expect this.”

Even though I have this weird feeling that French kickboxing champion turned VHS-era action icon Olivier Gruner doesn’t like me, I’m open to watching his movies. I actually didn’t realize while watching it that ANGEL TOWN was his debut, but it makes sense. This is his L.A. gang movie, which came out after COLORS but before BOYZ N THE HOOD or MENACE II SOCIETY (or New York movies like NEW JACK CITY and JUICE). And I’m not saying it’s as good as any of those, but it’s a fun b-action take on the subject, and it makes a decent argument for why Gruner should be in movies.

He plays Jacques, a Frenchman renting a room in a gang neighborhood while attending graduate school in East L.A. He ends up there because he gets into town late and all the student housing is filled up, but also we learn he was born in a French ghetto and lived in one in Hong Kong too. It’s not relevant, but I want to mention why he’s late to school: when he was about to leave he went to visit his father’s grave and then his girlfriend showed up distraught that he was leaving and she took off her fur coat and she was naked so he fucked her right there on his father’s grave. And that must’ve taken a couple days, I don’t know. (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Action, Martial Arts, Reviews | 2 Comments »

  • Hey bud, thanks for reading.

    Don't feel obligated, but here are some

  • WAYS YOU CAN SUPPORT THE SHIT OUT OF VERN & OUTLAWVERN.COM

    if that's your thing:

  • 1. Patreon

    Toss me a couple bucks a month, support the good shit, also get access to a bunch of exclusive writing. This is my primary source of writing money that has allowed me to cut down to part time at the day job. Thank you!

  • 2. Buy my books from your local bookseller or somebody

    click here for my Amazon author page

    (NOTE: My ten year contract has passed on the Titan books, so I don't get residuals on them like I do WORM ON A HOOK and NIKETOWN, but I would love for you to read them because I'm proud of them)

    EXTRA CREDIT: Review them on Amazon! That would really help me out. Unless you didn't like them, in which case forget I said anything.

  • 3. If you ever buy from Amazon, go through my links or search engines



    (you pay the same amount you were gonna pay anyway they cut me a little slice)

  • I also have an Amazon UK one:

    (I can't get the search box widget to work anymore, so click on MOONWALKER and then search for what you want.)

  • 4. My exciting line of fashion and leisure products

    (I get a couple bucks per item, you get a cool t-shirt, mug or lifestyle item)

  • 5. Spread the word

    Tell your friends about my reviews and my books and everything. Only cool people though please, we don't need a bunch of suckers and/or chumps around here.

    THANKS EVERYBODY. YOUR FRIEND, VERN

    * * * *

  • Recent commentary and jibber-jabber

    • Gary Anderson on Disclosure Day: “Hear hear, JeffG!” Jun 25, 13:54
    • JeffG on Disclosure Day: “I found myself giddy while watching this, but the reaction (just from eavesdropping in the lobby and bathroom afterwards) seemed…” Jun 25, 10:59
    • JTS on Carolina Caroline: “I really like Samara Weaving, and she’s great in this, so I liked this… but I agree that the transition…” Jun 25, 02:09
    • VERN on Disclosure Day: “Ben C. – I agree that it was a little odd that she was worried people would see aliens as…” Jun 24, 23:44
    • pegsman on Disclosure Day: “I was surprised by how much I liked this. I’m no fan of neither CLOSE ENCOUNTER nor E.T. But I…” Jun 24, 22:08
    • grimgrinningchris on Teen Wolf Too: “WINCHESTER- Nearly 6 years late responding to your comment. It was my 12th birthday so we must both be Thanksgiving…” Jun 24, 21:39
    • Tim Bobo on Disclosure Day: “Oh and Spielberg films I liked better in the past 20 years than this one are: Fablemans, West Side Story,…” Jun 24, 17:26
    • Tim Bobo on Disclosure Day: “I liked it , but didn’t really love it. It reminded me alot of Minority Report for some reason? Probably…” Jun 24, 17:22
    • Miguel Hombre on Disclosure Day: “Vern: this is one of the best reviews on this film I’ve read/seen, highlighting its many and obvious excellent aspects…” Jun 24, 17:07
    • Gepard on Disclosure Day: “This is Spielberg plus aliens and I want to be excited about it, but the trailers looked dull, like even…” Jun 24, 16:32
    • Mark Rawlings on The Cable Guy: “Love this film. Me and my (now sadly departed) friend, loved quoting this film especially the Medieval Times section. We…” Jun 24, 16:07
    • Ben C. on Disclosure Day: “I really wanted to like this one a lot more than I did – I love MINORITY REPORT and had…” Jun 24, 15:42
    • VERN on Disclosure Day: “I wish Spielberg would’ve asked that whippersnapper first so he would’ve known it’s way more cinematic to show Emily Blunt…” Jun 24, 15:21
    • Curt on Disclosure Day: “I read one extremely harsh online opinion (which I’m assuming was from a younger person) arguing that the movie is…” Jun 24, 15:01
    • Kit on Phoenix Jones: The Rise and Fall of a Real Life Superhero: “lol whoops – pretend that giant quote is just offsetting the text a bit” Jun 24, 02:32

  • Recent Commented on Posts

  • Most Comments