“I didn’t choose any of this, you know? This chose me.”
Friday, May 1st, 1992 was day 3 of the L.A. riots. The day Rodney King said “Can we all get along?” President George H.W. Bush invoked the Insurrection Act, so California Army National Guard and federal troops were activated under the newly formed Joint Task Force Los Angeles. In L.A. and San Francisco, NBA and MLB games were moved or postponed. Van Halen, Metallica, Guns N’ Roses and the WWF all cancelled events. Tension and shock spread across the country.
But also some people went to see movies. Mostly BASIC INSTINCT, which was still #1 in its seventh week. And a very small number of people must’ve went to see LEAVING NORMAL, a perfectly sweet little comedy-drama about white women. Maybe it wasn’t the best time for it. It was not a big enough release to make it onto the box office charts, and I honestly don’t remember ever hearing of it before researching this series. But if I’m gonna do Weird Summer I better cover a movie about leaving normal.
Actually it’s about a young woman named Marianne (Meg Tilly, PSYCHO II) and an older bar waitress named Darly (Christine Lahti, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE FABULOUS STAINS) deciding to leave a small, boring town called Normal. But I think we all get the implication. (read the rest of this shit…)
Like many citizens of the world, I love most of Steven Soderbergh’s movies. Still, the nature of streaming services and the lack of urgency their releases seem to inspire in my brain have left me behind in his return-from-retirement period. I haven’t seen the basketball one, the app one, the laundromat one, surely others.
But my favorite Soderberghs are the crime ones: #1 OUT OF SIGHT, #2 THE LIMEY, #3 the OCEAN’S series. And there was another one about a lady beating people up that I raved about for ten years, but that’s on hiatus for a while. These are all very different from each other in most respects other than quality. But his most recent one was released straight to Home Box Office Maximum and although this review is very late I actually managed to watch that one right away. And I loved it.
NO SUDDEN MOVE is another new mode of Soderbergh crime picture. Maybe it’s closest to THE LIMEY in tone: serious, with a high level of tension, but plenty of dry, dark, odd humor coming out of the characters and situations. Set in Detroit in 1956, it’s the story of small time criminal Curt Goynes (Don Cheadle, THE METEOR MAN), recently out due to overcrowding, still disgraced in the underworld after whatever the fiasco was that got him busted. So it’s either real lucky or awfully damn suspicious that someone he doesn’t know – white middle man Doug Jones (Brendan Fraser, MONKEYBONE) – is offering him five grand for what’s described as “a simple babysitting job” that will take three hours of his time. He doesn’t have to know he’s in a movie to have a pretty good hunch it’ll end up being more complicated than that. (read the rest of this shit…)
BILL & TED’S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE (1989) is one of those beloved comedies you take for granted. I hadn’t seen it in 20+ years, so I was kinda afraid it might not hold up. It’s kind of hard to put your finger on why it works so well, and it would be hard to explain why it’s funny if somebody asked. I’m not sure if you had to be there or not.
Don’t get me wrong – there’s a pretty straight forward comical premise: what if a couple of dumb guys got a hold of a time machine and recruited actual historical figures to help with their history test? But for the most part that’s not really what’s funny about it. It’s the particular personalities of the dumb guys, and the reasons they have access to time travel.
Bill S. Preston Esquire (Alex Winter, DEATH WISH 3) and Ted “Theodore” Logan (Keanu Reeves, THE NIGHT BEFORE) are a Californian version of what we used to call “rockers” and some regions called “heshers” – guys whose lives center around heavy metal and/or hard rock. In the wild you’d expect them to have longer hair and leather jackets, smoke lots of pot and drink lots of beer, but Bill and Ted mostly just idolize Van Halen, talk about “babes,” and laugh at the number 69. They have a band called Wyld Stallyns, which features only the two of them on guitar, an instrument neither of them knows how to play. Still, their worst fear os for the band to be broken up if Ted fails his history test, in which case his dad (Hal Landon Jr., ERASERHEAD), who is a police captain and wears an NRA jacket while off duty, will ship him off to Oats Military Academy in Alaska. (read the rest of this shit…)
a survey of summer movies that just didn’t catch on
“Are you tellin us that you’re gonna arrest a guy for bein a plumber? Get outta here!”
May 28, 1993
Okay, look. I’m not claiming to know a better way to make a live action movie based on a video game about an Italian plumber eating mushrooms, punching bricks and murdering hundreds and hundreds of turtles but also collecting coins while trying to rescue a princess. And seeing how directors Rocky Morton and Annabel Jankel reimagine the world of the famous Nintendo game as a dystopic Manhattan in an alternate dimension where people evolved out of dinosaurs is the closest thing to fun this movie has to offer.
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Recent commentary and jibber-jabber
VERN on Elvis: ““Is everything settled now?” That’s a great story. I like IT HAPPENED AT THE WORLD’S FAIR because it’s the only…” Jul 4, 23:18
Handsome Dan on Elvis: “Elvis actually did get a chance to use his karate, or at least threaten to, just a few months before…” Jul 4, 22:50
CJ Holden on Jurassic World Dominion: “I kiiiiiiiiiiiiinda gave up on THE PENTAVERATE after three episodes. Still planning to finish it, but it’s not too high…” Jul 4, 21:54
Zombo on Elvis: “I grew up in an era when Elvis was still a thing, although I have to admit that I never…” Jul 4, 21:10
Norma N on Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood: “By the way, another thing that is practically never mentioned is that Manson was not the first serial killer (yes,…” Jul 4, 19:36
Norma N on Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood: ““Does not going through the traumatic experience of a pregnant wife horrifically murdered while he’s out of town prevent him…” Jul 4, 19:20
Kaplan on Jurassic World Dominion: “I should note that Terminal List has Nick Chinlund in a fairly major role. That’s right. Nick. Chinlund.” Jul 4, 19:16
Stu on Elvis: “Loved this movie. Funny thing that happened through it was me looking up the actual footage of his performance of…” Jul 4, 19:08
VERN on Elvis: “Borg9 – I actually had a whole section about that “Fight the Power” line that I decided to cut out…” Jul 4, 18:51
Franchise Fred on The Powerpuff Girls: “Pac-Man, the worst MIB movie came out in 2019. I actually revisited MIIB (Men in in Black?) for the first…” Jul 4, 18:40
RRA on Elvis: “The uninteresting Elvis thing has some merit. A big appeal of GET BACK last year for me as a Beatles…” Jul 4, 17:22
Franchise Fred on Elvis: “I started in on Elvis movies a few years ago after the New Bev showed Jailhouse Rock. Jailhouse is legit…” Jul 4, 17:07
Pacman2.0 on Elvis: “You know I never thought about it, but I agree with Mr. Majestyk. Love the music, love some of his…” Jul 4, 15:20
Pacman2.0 on The Powerpuff Girls: “Ebert and Roeper, especially Ebert, famously went off on it, but mostly I think they assumed merchandise sales would translate…” Jul 4, 15:19
Franchise Fred on Elvis: “Wow, they are still making biopics in the Walk Hard mold. Respect was the biggest recent offender and you could…” Jul 4, 15:16
VERN’S “I RECOMMEND THE SHIT OUT OF THIS PRODUCT” CORNER: