LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD: 2-DISC ALLOWED TO SAY ‘MOTHERFUCKER’ EDITION

“YIPPEE KI YAY, MOVIE FANS!” That’s what some dipshit wrote on the back of the new LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD dvd. But in the new unrated cut of the movie itself John McClane is allowed to live free and say the whole legendary, maybe-shouldn’t-have-become-part-of-the-DIE-HARD-formula catch phrase. Say goodbye to “Yippee ki yay mother(gunshot).” It’s out the window like Hans Gruber.

The new cut is not drastically, hugely or monumentally different. If you hated the theatrical version you’ll still hate this one. The story is the same, I didn’t notice any scenes removed or added, there’s no new narration or a corny shot of a unicorn that’s supposed to make you see the whole movie in a new light. McClane still doesn’t make good on his threat to beat Kevin Smith’s character to death – not even in a deleted scene, unless it’s one a them “easter eggs” and I just didn’t find it. I’ll keep looking.

But what it does have is a whole bunch of little touches they never should’ve had to cut in the first place. Things most people wouldn’t notice but that add up to more of a DIE HARD tone overall. Like, for example, the hemoglobin. It sprays sometimes when people get shot. It squirts when the guy from DISTRICT B13 gets shredded (but it’s subtle, it’s not the Johnny Depp in NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET geyser I imagined). After Maggie Q shoots the technician at the power plant she squeakily wipes blood off his screen with her hand. That was my favorite little addition. After McClane throws this character Russo down the stairs and then steals his walkie talkie they show his whole bloody face instead of the tamer profile of the PG-13. When McClane finally takes out Gabriel there is a bloodspray this time, so it’s a little more clear what’s going on, although I still think they should’ve shown it from the side so you see both parties getting shot (the one part where I thought Len Wiseman blew it with his staging). (more…)

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