"CATCH YOU FUCKERS AT A BAD TIME?"

Posts Tagged ‘Bess Armstrong’

Dream Lover

Thursday, May 9th, 2024

May 6, 1994

The erotic thriller DREAM LOVER is so far the only movie directed by Nicholas Kazan, a writer who’s an Oscar nominee for REVERSAL OF FORTUNE and on my shit list for MOBSTERS. James Spader (SEX, LIES AND VIDEOTAPE) stars as Ray Reardon, successful architect, charmer, admitted bad husband, but supposed to be well-meaning and sweet. At his divorce hearing he fires his lawyer and lets his now-ex Martha (Kathleen York, unaired DARKMAN tv pilot) have everything. Sitting in the courthouse afterwards they look like they’re on a first date that’s going really well. They talk about how much they still love each other but she can’t stay with him because he hit her. Which seems more than fair to me! He tries to downgrade it to a slap or accidental bump and justify it as a response to her cheating on him, and this does not offend her. She puts her head on his shoulder and tearfully promises that the woman he finds who’s right for him will be “the luckiest woman alive.”

He’s got this buddy at work named Norman, played by Larry Miller (SUBURBAN COMMANDO) in the classic Dennis Miller/Denis Leary/Kevin Pollack type role of the comedian playing a horny best friend who’s sexist in a supposedly lovable way. Norman invites Ray to a gallery show to try to set him up with a woman (Blair Tefkin, V, FRIGHT NIGHT PART II), and while trying to escape her he spills wine on Lena Mathers (Mädchen Amick, TWIN PEAKS: FIRE WALK WITH ME, SLEEPWALKERS) and she chews him out. (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Reviews, Thriller | 17 Comments »

Jaws 3-D (40th anniversary revisit)

Thursday, July 20th, 2023

July 22, 1983

JAWS 3-D (viewed by me in its shameful flat version) is another summer of ’83 movie that I’ve previously reviewed. But that was 13 years ago, and if I’m doing a summer movie series I can’t really skip over a sequel to the movie that kinda invented the summer blockbuster. I also thought it would be a good marker on the timeline, much like how RETURN OF THE JEDI and STAYING ALIVE indicate how much culture had changed in the six years since STAR WARS and SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER. In eight years we went from a popular beach read elevated by a knockout directorial vision to a gimmicky studio product sequel with twice the budget but a fraction of the style or substance.

It’s tempting to see sequels as emblematic of the ‘80s, but the truth is I counted almost as many released in 1975 as in 1983*. I suppose a difference is that 8 of the 10 in ’75 were part 2s, whereas 1983 gave us such part 3s as this, RETURN OF THE JEDI, SUPERMAN III, AMITYVILLE 3-D, and SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT PART 3. THE OMEN, FRIDAY THE 13TH, HALLOWEEN and ROCKY series’ had also hit part three in 1981 or 1982. So maybe it really was a different movie landscape. The era of part threes, heading into part fours. (read the rest of this shit…)

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in Reviews, Horror | 18 Comments »

  • Hey bud, thanks for reading.

    Don't feel obligated, but here are some

  • WAYS YOU CAN SUPPORT THE SHIT OUT OF VERN & OUTLAWVERN.COM

    if that's your thing:

  • 1. Patreon

    Toss me a couple bucks a month, support the good shit, also get access to a bunch of exclusive writing. This is my primary source of writing money that has allowed me to cut down to part time at the day job. Thank you!

  • 2. Buy my books from your local bookseller or somebody

    click here for my Amazon author page

    (NOTE: My ten year contract has passed on the Titan books, so I don't get residuals on them like I do WORM ON A HOOK and NIKETOWN, but I would love for you to read them because I'm proud of them)

    EXTRA CREDIT: Review them on Amazon! That would really help me out. Unless you didn't like them, in which case forget I said anything.

  • 3. If you ever buy from Amazon, go through my links or search engines



    (you pay the same amount you were gonna pay anyway they cut me a little slice)

  • I also have an Amazon UK one:

    (I can't get the search box widget to work anymore, so click on MOONWALKER and then search for what you want.)

  • 4. My exciting line of fashion and leisure products

    (I get a couple bucks per item, you get a cool t-shirt, mug or lifestyle item)

  • 5. Spread the word

    Tell your friends about my reviews and my books and everything. Only cool people though please, we don't need a bunch of suckers and/or chumps around here.

    THANKS EVERYBODY. YOUR FRIEND, VERN

    * * * *

  • Recent commentary and jibber-jabber

    • Ben Railton on Jean-Michel Basquiat triple feature: The Radiant Child / Basquiat / Downtown 81: “Really loved this review, Vern. Shared it, as part of a ton of great writing & work from the last…” Nov 17, 05:20
    • Skani on Man, I don’t know.: “@Fred, probably you’ve broken through to that next level of celebrity and have a fan account. Or maybe an evil…” Nov 17, 05:20
    • Skani on Man, I don’t know.: “Hi @GlaiveRobber – I think you raise good points here. I think Trump is pretty damn hardy for his age,…” Nov 17, 03:34
    • jojo on Jean-Michel Basquiat triple feature: The Radiant Child / Basquiat / Downtown 81: “I imagine if I were a filmmaker I’d be really annoyed, after spending two years-plus on a movie and a…” Nov 17, 03:17
    • Franchise Fred on Man, I don’t know.: “Do I have a Letterboxd account? I never use it. Is there a fake Franchise Fred????” Nov 16, 20:49
    • Glaive Robber on Man, I don’t know.: “Skani, many thanks for the reply. I may have been a little misunderstood. I do honestly think there should have…” Nov 16, 20:24
    • Skani on Man, I don’t know.: “Hey Fred, I’m glad some of this nonsense has been helpful to someone. Other than a LinkedIn account under my…” Nov 16, 20:18
    • Franchise Fred on Man, I don’t know.: “Skani, I have appreciated your very level headed posts about some very volatile subjects in this thread and would even…” Nov 16, 17:16
    • Skani on Juror #2: “That’s pretty hilarious, Milton Friedman and Chomsky. No, yeah, that’s about right, as far as my read on Eastwood –…” Nov 16, 14:42
    • Miguel Hombre on Juror #2: “Man oh man, I do not want to start a war on another thread about politics – but since Eastwood…” Nov 16, 14:31
    • Skani on Juror #2: “Miguel, that’s all very well-said, and I did not know that shit. I am a more casual Clint fan, but…” Nov 16, 14:03
    • Miguel Hombre on Juror #2: “Skani: This is also in no way a defense of Zaslav either – but Warner Brothers has released a very…” Nov 16, 13:34
    • Skani on Man, I don’t know.: “Actually, I should say — a lot of my analysis of media is based on written news, and I can’t…” Nov 16, 13:25
    • Skani on Man, I don’t know.: “Hey, @GlaiveRobber – To your first point about masculinity. There definitely is a “there” there with the concept of “toxic…” Nov 16, 13:13
    • VERN on Juror #2: “The problem with that is that the investment of streaming movies is just promoting your streaming service, or your stock…” Nov 16, 09:52

  • Recent Commented on Posts

  • Most Comments