I don’t know why I never got around to seeing the THE CROW sequel from the director of SIX-STRING SAMURAI. Always was curious. Still took me 19 years. Lance Mungia’s THE CROW: WICKED PRAYER, just like the previous one, was meant for theaters, but I think it only played somewhere around here? Wiki(dprayer)pedia says its theatrical run was only in Seattle and only for one week, and I do remember seeing an ad for it and being confused, but I was thinking it was in Eastern Washington. Anyway, I didn’t go.
When I saw DOMINO on opening day in 2005, I really thought it was the worst shit ever. In fact, at some point I earnestly added a “the worst shit ever” tag to my review of it. Tony Scott’s most chaotic ever visual style and editing just scraped against me and took me out of the story (to the extent that there was one), and I fixated on that and raged against it in my review. This had happened to me only a couple of times before: first with CON AIR, then ARMAGEDDON, and later it would happen with TRANSFORMERS and DOOMSDAY. But DOMINO is the most stylistically aggressive of any of those, and arguably the most pretentious.
In my review I said Scott was trying to seem young and edgy, compared it to getting his ear pierced. In my mind at that time he was the guy who directed TOP GUN, and TOP GUN was a movie for jocks, military lovers and top 40 listeners. When that one came out I didn’t notice that its style was revolutionary, I just knew everybody loved it including my entire sixth grade class, which meant it was the height of mainstream popular culture about a year or two before I would start kneejerk rebelling against such things. So to have the TOP GUN guy, almost 20 years later, trying to do what screenwriter Richard Kelly calls on the commentary track “punk rock,” was just a joke to me. (read the rest of this shit…)
“He had an uneventful childhood. He played baseball with the other kids on the block, became fascinated with the antics of what later became his heroes – The Three Stooges, read Spiderman comic books, thought Jerry Lewis was hilarious and the Little Rascals even more so. What influenced Raimi to become the ‘horror meister’ of slash and gore films is not found in his past.”
—Dead Auteur: How a 20-year-old ex-college student carved out his horror niche in Hollywood by Sue Uram, Cinefantastique, August 1992
Immediately following Raimi’s very serious director period, his career changed drastically again. After so many stabs at the mainstream, he finally made the leap to genuine blockbuster filmmaking, bringing one of the most famous characters in the history of American pop culture to the big screen for the first time. This is not the use-Intro-Vision-to-stretch-the-budget-enough-to-try-to-compete-in-summer of DARKMAN and ARMY OF DARKNESS, or the work-with-huge-stars-but-scare-off-boring-people-by-doing-something-different-with-them of THE QUICK AND THE DEAD. I’m talking a super hero event movie with ten times the budget of DARKMAN, working with Sony Digital Imageworks to pioneer effects techniques that nobody was even sure would be possible, and finally sharing his talents with pretty much the widest audience possible for a movie. (read the rest of this shit…)
THE PAPERBOY is the new one from Academy Award nominee for Best Director Lee Daniels. That’s the guy that did PRECIOUS, BASED ON THE NOVEL PUSH BY SAPPHIRE as well as SHADOWBOXER, BASED ON THE IDEA THAT HELEN MIRREN AND CUBA GOODING JR. ARE ASSASSINS AND SHE RAISED HIM BUT ALSO THEY’RE FUCKING AND SHE HAS CANCER. I feel like the critical community embraced PRECIOUS without really picking up on how nutty it was, or doing a background check on Mr. Daniels’s previous work. So they did cartoony “wh-wh-whUHHH?” double-takes when THE PAPERBOY played at Cannes and had a part where Nicole Kidman territorially pisses on Zac Efron from HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL. Because it’s a Lee Daniels movie. (read the rest of this shit…)
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if that's your thing:
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THANKS EVERYBODY. YOUR FRIEND, VERN
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Recent commentary and jibber-jabber
Felix Ng on Humint: “The last 30 mins is total Heroic Bloodshed. More John Woo than some of his recent films.” Apr 20, 21:49
KayKay on Humint: “Second the love for Officer Black Belt!” Apr 20, 17:42
Gary Jive on Humint: “Netflix really does have some great Korean stuff hiding away in there. You must check out Officer Black-belt – it’s…” Apr 20, 13:48
Brian Johnson on Thick as Thieves (1999): “I’m interested in receiving emails from your company regarding old DVD movies” Apr 20, 09:39
Borg9 on Space Sweepers: “I liked this one and had a fun time with it back then, but I think I felt that both…” Apr 20, 08:57
KayKay on Humint: “On my to-watch list! Ryoo Seung-wan is easily one of my favorite Korean directors, been a fan since the days…” Apr 20, 08:49
Hostile18 on Escape Plan 2: Hades: “Just listened to a 2024 interview with director Steven c. Miller and learned the term “Geezer Teaser.”” Apr 20, 07:16
VERN on Samurai Marathon: “I don’t remember any details, just that I loved this movie, but I’m sure you must be right. Thanks for…” Apr 19, 18:23
randomuser on Samurai Marathon: “My mistake, after rechecking the black ships event is actually took place at different region Uraga and not the trading…” Apr 19, 14:36
randomuser on Samurai Marathon: “There’s error in your review summary, if you follow the scene and story carefully, Hayabusha who in the end barged…” Apr 19, 12:57
CJ Holden on Hellboy: The Crooked Man: “Randomly picked this one for my Sunday afternoon distraction and I actually mostly liked it. It does indeed feel more…” Apr 19, 08:53
Dooleyn the Gravedigger on A Tree of Palme: “Top review Vern, I had never heard of this one and am seeking it out. Go check out Venus Wars,…” Apr 16, 13:25
CJ Holden on The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas: “Thankfully in my youth cartoons only aired on weekends, so I didn’t exactly had a 24/7 oversaturation on anything. And…” Apr 16, 06:43
Alex R on The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas: “@Daniel — That’s a good point and totally fair. And plenty cartoons are repetitive– speaking of Droopy, I remember buying…” Apr 16, 06:27
CJ Holden on The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas: “Eh. I mean despite enjoying PUP I’ve never been a fan of “dumb Fred”, but in MYSTERY INCORPORATED they cranked…” Apr 16, 06:16