PRAYER OF THE ROLLERBOYS (1990) is not a great ‘90s b-movie in the sense of being a thrilling piece of cinematic storytelling, but it stills stands as a type I enjoy due to many valuable qualities. First, there is its pure nineties-ness: its strongly held belief that rollerblading is really cool, Corey Haim’s skater hair, tying a flannel shirt around his waist, “Head Like a Hole” on the soundtrack. It being only the very beginning the nineties, there’s also a leftover-eighties-ness: lots of outdoor TVs, ritzy apartments with weird art made out of mannequins, some attempts at Verhoevenian satire in news reports.

Most notable, I think, there’s a political side to it that’s sadly right on the money for now. Not all of it; its idea of American collapse is that the government will borrow too much money, then force all the newly homeless people into camps, and also Harvard will be moved brick-by-brick to Hiroshima. (There used to be anxiety about Japanese business taking over America. See also: GUNG HO, DIE HARD.) But the part that’s sadly trenchant right now is that the title villains are like sci-fi Proud Boys: an anti-immigrant, white power gang with a uniform (beige trenchcoats and droog suspesnders). They’re controversial, yet they have strong enough ties to the government to buy a former naval shipyard, including its freighters! Some cops are trying to bust them but (spoiler) it’s actually for corrupt purposes. Oh yeah and they rollerblade around in a flock, synchronizing the waving of their arms to look menacing.

Their leader Gary Lee (Christopher Collet, SLEEPAWAY CAMP) alternately acts like a punk gang leader or a yuppie businessman, but Collet mostly has the good sense to play him acting nice to attract potential followers. There is a rollerblading initiation ritual, but it really doesn’t seem to be the focus of their gang, which is kind of weird. You’d think they’d be preying on people who love to catch sick air and what not but otherwise wouldn’t have turned into skinheads.

Haim (between DREAM A LITTLE DREAM and FAST GETAWAY) stars as Griffin, an excellent inline skater but not a member of the Rollerboys. Since the car accident death of his parents he’s lived in a tent, providing for his little brother Miltie (Devin Clark, BICYCLE SAFETY CAMP) by delivering pizzas in an armored van for Pinky’s Pizzaz. They have sort of a father figure named Speedbagger (Julius Harris, SHRUNKEN HEADS), a bike mechanic who trains them to box. Griffin and Gary Lee were neighbors when they were about eight, but Griffin now avoids Gary Lee at all costs, recognizing him as a cult leader appealing to people’s bigotry. But one day while working he sees that a Rollerboy named Bullwinkle (Morgan Weisser, BULLETFACE) is trapped in a burning house and he saves his life by crashing the Pinky’s van through the side. Bullwinkle still hates him but Gary Lee tells him he’s grateful and then, via Miltie, provides Pinky with a new van.

See, it’s that Frank Lucas approach. The Rollerboys also have soup kitchen food trucks and pass out Rollerboy comic books to kids. We don’t get to see the comics, but maybe they’re the same artist who did this cake we see at a party:

And by the way I think they have a gift shop?

There are little bits of world building here and there, like the announcement of a “Stage 3 Ozone Alert,” a news story about undocumented Americans in Mexico. One of the few hints about life away from here happens when Miltie scoffs at the idea of moving. “Where, the outerlands? Yeah, work meltdown cleanup? Live in bubble towns?”

It’s dystopic verging on post-apocalyptic, but very specifically Californian. You’ve got beaches, the L.A. River, vintage convertibles, punk houses reminiscent of THRASHIN’, often shot with a yellow haze. The transfer on the DVD is pretty bad but you can still tell it’s good looking for this type of movie. It’s an early one for cinematographer Phedon Papamichael, who later worked with Alexander Payne (SIDEWAYS through DOWNSIZING) and James Mangold (IDENTITY through A COMPLETE UNKNOWN).

Gary Lee makes his populist appeal to the victims of “The Great Crash” by claiming that “alien races foreclosed on our nation… now America belongs to the enemy.” He’s also the kind of guy who brings up somebody’s ethnicity for no reason, as in “that Pollock cop.” Later some of his guys will drop much worse slurs. In his speeches, in murals, etc. they all look forward to “The Day of the Rope.” To Gary Lee it’s actually a code word for sort of a THREE THE HARD WAY type plot (they’re trying to get all the supposedly impure people hooked on their designer drug Mist, to make them sterile), but everyone else thinks it’s “when we take revenge,” and I’m sure it’s intentional that it’s a term from The Turner Diaries, a race war novel written by a white supremacist that’s a favorite of neo-nazis and Timothy McVeigh (see also THE ORDER). So it’s very creepy when the Rollerboys are chanting “Day of the Rope!” and it cuts to a bunch of little kid Rollerboys who are really into it. Sort of like FURY ROAD‘s war pups but with less distance from our current reality.

Griffin gets hassled by a pair of detectives who wear old timey fedoras, plus another cop named Jaworski who always calls him “Ramrod” for some reason. Worried about his brother being seduced into bigotry, Griffin offers to use his new good standing with the Rollerboys to go undercover, in exchange for Jaworski’s help relocating. Then he learns that Casey (Patricia Arquette, A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS), a hottie who tried to buy Mist from him, is already undercover. Pretty soon they’re fuckin.

If you check out how cool and gorgeous Arquette looks in her cheetah-print shirt and sunglasses you might agree with me that it’s very possible this movie played a part in her casting in TRUE ROMANCE. This movie doesn’t give her a great character to play, but it seems to have a huge crush on her. It’s comical how many times Griffin and Casey make out. One of the times it’s the requisite sex scene, but mostly it’s them being all cutesy and lovey dovey.

In traditional undercover story fashion he impresses Gary Lee, has a rival in the organization, has another guy he gets along with uncomfortably well, has to do shit he’s ashamed of (including making Speedbagger believe he’s a racist, and worse), is in danger of being caught. He achieves his ultimate goal of infiltrating the drug lab, called The Kitchen, run by the “chef” Bango (Mark Pellegrino, the blond guy looking for “the deadbeat Lebowski” in THE BIG LEBOWSKI).

Of course one of the novelties is lots of rollerblading in graffiti-covered pools, or in parking garages. Also one scene where they have to run up stairs with rollerblades on. Looks silly but challenging. There are many machine guns, a few explosions. The stunt coordinator is the legendary Dan Bradley (TRANCERS, THE BOURNE SUPREMACY).

PRAYER OF THE ROLLERBOYS is directed by Rick King (KICKBOXER 3: THE ART OF WAR) and written by W. Peter Iliff (POINT BREAK, which King also has a story credit on). If you think about it there’s some overlap there – a guy going undercover with an extreme sports gang. I’m glad it doesn’t treat Gary Lee with respect like Bodhi, though.

It’s kind of crazy to think that POINT BREAK must’ve already been in the works while they were doing this movie, since it came out the following year. And if Kathryn Bigelow saw this then maybe James Cameron saw it, with little tough talking Miltie in his army jacket before he gave us young John Connor in T2. (John Connor is cooler, though. Whatever you may think of him, at least he never calls the Terminator “bro-ski.”)

If you read my 30th anniversary revisit of POINT BREAK you may remember that in 2020 Iliff started a controversy in L.A. by hiring a crew to clear out a homeless encampment under a tunnel and replace it with boulders so they couldn’t come back. Maybe now he’d prefer those government run camps. But he seemed to be coming from the right place 36 years ago.

At the end they’re leaving to start a new life in Oregon, which seems like a normal ending, but then they show that Gary Lee knows where they’re headed and plans to expand his criminal empire there. It really seems like a sequel set up. I wish it had been! But I don’t want Rollerboys in the northwest. They are not welcome here.

I wonder what the deal is with this one? Seems like Vinegar Syndrome would’ve put it out by now if the rights and elements were available. Somebody better do it before the Great Collapse.

Thank you to Nate Patrin on Bluesky for his excitement that I used PRAYER OF THE ROLLERBOYS as Arquette’s credit in my THEY WILL KILL YOU review. He wrote “I know that means there’s someone else out there who thinks it predicted groypers,” and that inspired me to do a review.