"CATCH YOU FUCKERS AT A BAD TIME?"

The Rip

THE RIP is Netflix’s new Gritty Cop Thriller (G.C.T.) written and directed by Joe Carnahan (THE A-TEAM, THE GREY, BOSS LEVEL), sharing story credit with Michael McGrale (additional literary material, THE EXPENDABLES 4). It’s a pretty good movie if you enjoy Carnahan’s more serious minded work and/or if you’re interested in the gimmick of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon reuniting as best buddies but in a movie where they’re Gritty Cops so they’re each afraid the other is corrupt and is gonna stab them in the back. There is friendship but also yelling, guns, etc.

It all starts with the prologue death of Captain Jackie Velez (Lina Esco, LONDON) of the Miami-Dade PD. She seems to be Onto Something Big when she gets ambushed by masked men. It’s a good shoot out scene, of the post-HEAT loud and quasi-realistic variety. I like the detail that she’s having trouble calling for help because she got some of her blood on her phone screen. This is the incident that sends FBI agents played by Scott Adkins (X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE) and Daisuke Tsuji (Ghost of Tsushima video game) in to question the members of Jackie’s elite Tactical Narcotics Team (TNT), suggesting they might have been involved. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 22nd, 2026 | 11 Comments »

28 Years Later: The Bone Temple

I liked 28 DAYS LATER when it came out in 2003 and I liked 28 WEEKS LATER when it came out in 2007, but I still have never revisited them. So I’m honestly very surprised how invested I am in this followup trilogy that started last year with Danny Boyle’s 28 YEARS LATER and now continues with Nia DaCosta’s 28 YEARS LATER: THE BONE TEMPLE.

It was such a surprising choice: Boyle and writer Alex Garland finally made their long anticipated third film, but also prepared a script for the director of LITTLE WOODS and CANDYMAN 2021 to shoot back-to-back with it. Boyle’s movie set up the new characters, and now DaCosta continues their story, but other than a few homages during zombie attacks she doesn’t mimic Boyle’s style at all. Cinematographer Sean Bobbitt (THE PLACE BEYOND THE PINES, WIDOWS, THE RHYTHM SECTION), editor Jake Roberts (HELL OR HIGH WATER, MEN) and composer Hildur Guðnadóttir (JOKER, TÁR) all go in very different directions from the distinct ones Boyle’s team chose, giving us a calmer and more traditional (not shot on iPhones) but still very effective look at this world of a zombie infection pandemic and its survivors. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 21st, 2026 | 12 Comments »

Marshmallow

MARSHMALLOW (2025) is a well made summer camp horror movie that manages the impressive feat of not really seeming like a riff on FRIDAY THE 13TH, SLEEPAWAY CAMP or THE BURNING (or for that matter CHEERLEADER CAMP, MADMAN, STAGE FRIGHT, CUB, or HELL OF A SUMMER). It does this in part by taking the kids, the parents and (to a lesser extent) the counselors seriously as characters and giving them relatable emotions before most of the horror movie stuff kicks in.

Morgan (Kue Lawrence, DEATHCEMBER, SKETCH) is a shy kid cursed with a horrendous bowl cut. In the opening scene he timidly approaches some taller kids who are aggressively passing a basketball around and asks if he can join them. They pretty much tell him to eat shit and run away while laughing at him. Morgan doesn’t notice this, but his grandpa (Corbin Bernsen, THE DENTIST) is sitting across the street witnessing the whole thing. So we feel both the pain of the kid and of the adult who’s gotta be torn up about what he’s seeing but can’t really intervene without humiliating the kid further. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 20th, 2026 | 2 Comments »

Bugonia

BUGONIA is the 2025 movie from director Yorgos Lanthimos, who just did POOR THINGS in 2023 and then KINDS OF KINDNESS in 2024. I can’t even keep up with the guy! This one’s a little different because it’s a remake of the 2003 South Korean film SAVE THE GREEN PLANET!. By all accounts it’s great, but I still haven’t seen it, so calculate that in if you’re trying to figure out how much you’ll like this.

I assumed it was a situation like Spike Lee’s OLDBOY where producers were trying to do the English language version for some reason and found an auteur to do it, but it turns out this would’ve been original director Jang Joon-hwan remaking his own movie if he hadn’t gotten sick and handed the reins (and the script by Will Tracy [THE MENU, former editor in chief of The Onion]) over to Lanthimos. Jang is still an executive producer, along with Ari Aster and others.

Nevertheless it feels very Lanthimos, and reunites him with Emma Stone and Jesse Plemons, plus his team of cinematographer Robbie Ryan, editor Yorgos Mavropsaridis, composer Jerskin Fendrix and production designer James Price. I wouldn’t consider it a work-for-hire. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 19th, 2026 | 5 Comments »

Nature Calls

Last month I got interested in the indie writer/director Todd Rohal, and reviewed three of his movies: THE GUATEMALAN HANDSHAKE, THE CATECHISM CATACLYSM, and of course his latest, FUCK MY SON!. Now I watched another one.

Of the Rohal joints I’ve seen so far, NATURE CALLS (2012) is the closest to a normal, mainstream comedy. It stars well known comedians/funny actors, it’s full of many broad, silly jokes, its third act shift into craziness overdrive is tame compared to Rohal’s other films. But not in a bad way. It’s a very funny movie with plenty of the director’s personality evident, which is kind of a relief because jesus christ man look at this DVD cover:


I don’t think Rohal is trying to be subversive with this one, but it kinda does the trick just by looking like disposable crap but having some bluntly accurate social satire and a strange tone that’s pretty much a family movie but with death and boobs and cursing. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 15th, 2026 | 1 Comment »

It Was Just an Accident

IT WAS JUST AN ACCIDENT is last year’s Palme d’Or winning film by Iranian writer/director Jafar Panahi (THE WHITE BALLOON, OFFSIDE). It’s a wrenching drama about ordinary people who were once political prisoners and suddenly stumble across a chance for some payback.

It does start with an accident, when a man (Ebrahim Azizi) driving with his wife (Afssaneh Najmabadi) and kid (Delnaz Najafi) at night hits one of the many stray dogs that roam the streets, damaging his car. He stops at a garage where one of the mechanics, Vahid (Vahid Mobasseri, NO BEARS), perks up at the sound of his squeaking prosthetic leg. He clearly recognizes him.

The next day Vahid follows the guy. Watches him. It’s very tense. He’s circling around in his car. He has a shovel. He hits him with it. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 14th, 2026 | 2 Comments »

Chain Reactions

I think I mentioned this once a long time ago, but Tobe Hooper’s THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE is one of my favorite movies, and one of the great cinematic obsessions of my life. So I’m happy to say that the recent documentary about the movie, CHAIN REACTIONS, is a good one.

It’s not about the making of the movie. For that I recommend Brad Shellady’s THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE: A FAMILY PORTRAIT (1988), which is an oral history through interviews with the actors who played the family members. This one is more of a video essay, speaking to five people who had nothing to do with the movie – a comedian, two filmmakers, a critic and a novelist. (Specifically it’s Patton Oswalt, Takashi Miike, Alexandra Heller-Nicholas, Stephen King and Karyn Kusama.) I think they have some good insights, but what made this really work for me is the specific ways director Alexandre O. Philippe (MEMORY: THE ORIGINS OF ALIEN, LYNCH/OZ) visually weaves together the interviews with different experiences of THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE and horror films as a whole, while avoiding pretty much all of the annoying cliches of modern fan documentaries. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 13th, 2026 | 2 Comments »

Fremont

FREMONT (2023) is an odd, dry little indie film I came across. I guess if forced I’d have to classify it as a drama, just so nobody gets mad at me for it not being a laugh riot. But it’s not really heavy, kind of a strange undertone of sad and funny, which is why I liked it.

Donya (Anaita Wali Zada) is an Afghan refugee in Fremont, California. She lives in the same building as some other Afghans, including one (Timur Nusratty) who won’t even acknowledge her. She says it’s because she “worked with the enemy” by being a translator for the U.S. Army. She did that for a visa, for a chance to get the fuck out of there, to get anywhere else. Not necessarily here.

She commutes to San Francisco to work at a small fortune cookie factory. “I thought it would be lovely to see Chinese people sometimes,” she explains. The process of how the cookies are made is also a pretty lovely thing to see in a movie. (read the rest of this shit…)

January 12th, 2026 | 3 Comments »

Johnny Hamlet

Like I said in my review of HAMNET yesterday, I struggle with understanding the Shakespeare works. That movie was historical fiction depicting the play Hamlet as Shakespeare’s weird way of processing the death of his son Hamnet. Although I kinda liked the movie I felt like I didn’t have the background to properly appreciate it, so I am correcting that by watching JOHNNY HAMLET, a 1968 spaghetti western version of the Hamlet story directed by Enzo G. Castellari (THE INGLORIOUS BASTARDS) and written by Sergio Corbucci (DJANGO).

We’ve already established that I’m no expert on the subject, but this was way more upfront about being Hamlet than I expected. The Italian title wasn’t even Hamlet related, it was Quella sporca storia nel West (That Dirty Story in the West), but the movie opens with Johnny Hamilton (Andrea Giordana, THE DIRTY OUTLAWS) stained with blood, standing in an eerily foggy cave, slowly approaching a mysterious caped figure, calling him “father.”

(read the rest of this shit…)

January 8th, 2026 | 4 Comments »

Hamnet

Look, I’m not one of those people who brags about their ignorance like it’s some badge of working class authenticity. I’m mostly a smart guy, and would love to be smarter. But I’m honestly admitting here that I’m not all that qualified for the works of William Shakespeare. I’ve enjoyed some of the adaptations, mostly the more stylistically adventurous ones like TITUS or ROMEO + JULIET or even THE TRAGEDY OF MACBETH. But the language (beautiful as it may be) is a real obstacle for me. I always struggle with following what anyone is talking about, and you mostly gotta know what they’re talking about to know what’s happening.

Even the ones I can get a grip on I barely retain memory of afterwards. Sometimes I can’t even remember if it’s Macbeth or Hamlet that has the Ghost Dad. I really have to go into my brain and do the following math: oh yeah, in THE NORTHMAN his name is Amleth, so that’s inspired by the same story that Hamlet is inspired by, so Hamlet is the one where his uncle killed his dad. And that was also the one that STRANGE BREW was riffing on and that had the Ghost Dad. Okay, got it. I know all about Hamlet.

(read the rest of this shit…)

January 7th, 2026 | 15 Comments »

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