I’m trying to decide if Clubside Chris is my Q, or my Lucius Fox. I would say he’s the janitor from DIE HARD 2, but he’s too high tech for that. And it wouldn’t be nice to say he’s Kevin Smith from DIE HARD 4.
Anyway he’s been striving the shit out of the excellence and is programming in his computers and everything and honestly I got no clue what he’s doing with most of this but he keeps coming up with great features for outlawvern.com. What he’s really been sweating over for a while is this database that creates new and better ways to browse the review archive. If you look above there’s a “Reviews” button you can click on that goes to a dropdown menu with the different options. You can look at all my reviews in traditional alphabetical order, you can look at them in chronological order by release date, you can flip through the fancy timeline version…
The options I’m really excited about are the ones that are sorted by category: all my DTV reviews in chronological order, all my slasher reviews. There’s a new one called “Icons” where you can access all my Nicolas Cages, all my Dolphs, stuff like that, with all the movie posters of the reviewed titles, in release order.
I love these because I’m jumping around watching and writing about all different movies and they’re slowly forming into this history, so I can look at them in context. I can look at the DTV list and see that the earliest one I’ve reviewed is VIDEO VIOLENCE from ’87 and the next is SILENT NIGHT, DEAD NIGHT 3 in ’89, so that encourages me to look into what else came out before and around that time and see what’s up. It takes these scattershot writings and forms them together into a body of research that I’m building for the betterment of mankind or whatever.
Anyway when you feel like reading some reviews please try these features out and let Chris know what you think or any suggestions you have for how it could be even better.
thanks everybody and thanks Chris
WU DANG is not only an alternate spelling of “Wu Tang” and an excellent new exclamation to use, but also a nice period martial arts picture that just came to the region 1 DVD. The director is Patrick Leung (THE TWINS EFFECT II), the action choreographer is the great Corey Yuen.
“If anyone’s gonna pee on him, it’s gonna be me!”
Remember after THE ROAD director John Hillcoat had this movie called THE WETTEST COUNTY IN THE WORLD that was written by his THE PROPOSITION writer (and famed singer) Nick Cave, he had at-that-time-hot-stuff Shia LaBeouf signed on and everything but nobody would fund the fuckin thing. Then suddenly a mysterious benefactor named Megan Ellison comes into Hollywood and gives him money and gives P.T. Anderson money to make THE MASTER and Andrew Dominik to do KILLING THEM SOFTLY and a bunch of other guys like this. So the legends were true, there are some good rich people out there.
From the director of THE EXPENDABLES 2 and a synonym for the word “TAKEN” comes this mediocre Cager about a “master thief” whose disgruntled ex-partner kidnaps his daughter.
After some family related emotional exhaustion this Thanksgiving I thought it would be a good time to seek the comfort of the ol’ Clint Eastwood box set. Clint and his movies are always there for us, even if we chose not to follow 
LIFE OF PI is the story of an Indian guy (Irrfan Khan) who for some reason has a white author guy (Rafe Spall) he doesn’t know come over to his house to interview him about his life. It’s kind of unclear what the situation is here, but apparently the writer guy is not in the book the movie is based on, so I guess this is a dramatization of what the making of the book would’ve been like if it was a true story that a a real guy told to the author instead of something that he made up and wrote using his imagination and talents. I don’t get it, but it kind of reminds me of BIG FISH. Sophomore year imagination class. That’s at least a huge step forward for screenwriter David Magee, considering he wrote 
I just found out about this and I thought you guys had the right to know. According to 
LOCKOUT is pretty much what I hope for from a Luc Besson production: solid b-movie fun, good gimmicks, good energy. But unlike the B13s or the TRANSPORTERs or the TAXIs or the YAMAKASIs it’s not the action that’s the highlight, this is more of a character and concept driven entertainment.
DOA: DEAD OR ALIVE is the name of a tournament where the best fighters from around the world are invited to come stay on a remote island where they are pitted against each other in un-refereed fights with few rules. It’s like Mortal Kombat except not interdimensional, no monsters, during daylight, and not to the death. So they probly could’ve picked a better name. Maybe just “A.”
