Archive for the ‘Reviews’ Category
Monday, December 30th, 2024
I’m not fully acquainted with the filmography of John Sayles, but I’m pretty sure THE BROTHER FROM ANOTHER PLANET is an outlier. It was 1984, so Sayles had already had his Roger Corman/exploitation beginnings (writing PIRANHA, BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS, ALLIGATOR, THE HOWLING and THE CHALLENGE) and moved into directing his indie dramas (RETURN OF THE SECAUCUS 7, LIANNA, BABY IT’S YOU). Here he makes his only ever sci-fi movie as a director, but it’s not all that commercial. Supposedly the story came to him in a dream.
The most sci-fi part is the opening cockpit lights and bleeping sounds as the mysterious extra-terrestrial played by Joe Morton (CURSE OF THE PINK PANTHER) crash lands on earth. He loses a leg in the process and hops around in an abandoned church until he somehow grows it back. Since he’s missing one shoe we see that his feet have three big clawed toes, like a dragon, but otherwise he looks human. In the city he finds a replacement shoe in a garbage can and I wondered if he understood that was garbage or if he just assumed Earth has public shoe dispensers. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Bill Cobbs, Caroline Aaron, Daryl Edwards, David Strathairn, Dee Dee Bridgewater, Ernest Dickerson, Fisher Stevens, Giancarlo Esposito, Harlem, Jamie Tirelli, Joe Morton, John Sayles, Leonard Jackson, Liane Curtis, Michael Mantell, Reggie Rock Bythewood, Steve James, Tom Wright
Posted in Reviews, Science Fiction and Space Shit | 6 Comments »
Tuesday, December 24th, 2024
RED ONE is not a prequel to THE BIG RED ONE or READY PLAYER ONE, but in fact a Christmas fantasy action movie produced by Amazon Product Corporation and starring Dwayne The Rock Johnson and Chris Formerly Captain America Evans. It has made around $180 million in theaters but is considered a flop because it cost something like $250 million before marketing. I have seen many holding it up as an example of the worst fucking crap imaginable. “Slop,” if you will.
I don’t have a high opinion of most of the recent artistic choices of the named parties, so I didn’t rush out to see it. But now I have seen it on Amazon’s streaming/package delivery service (it’s already on there) and it is my duty to report that I liked it. This is a genuinely funny movie! That is not something I expect out of Dwayne T.R. Johnson in the year 2024. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Bonnie Hunt, Chris Evans, Chris Morgan, Christmas, Christmas action, J.K. Simmons, Jake Kasdan, Kiernan Shipka, Lucy Liu, Reinaldo Faberlie, The Rock
Posted in Reviews, Action, Comedy/Laffs, Fantasy/Swords | 42 Comments »
Monday, December 23rd, 2024
Like all modern horror movies, CARNAGE FOR CHRISTMAS – a 2024 indie that came to Shudder on the 15th – is about a true crime podcaster who experienced trauma. But it does not feel like it’s trying to be “about trauma,” and the true crime aspect works because the protagonist, Lola Darling (Jeremy Moineau) is treated as a straight up detective character like Nancy Drew, Jessica Fletcher or somebody there’d be a BBC mystery series about. She’s very self-possessed, observant and knowledgeable, has an interest in the morbid, sneaks around crime scenes with a flash light, brings her own latex gloves.
She’s nervous about returning to the small town she left when she was 16. Yes, it’s the site of the aforementioned trauma (discovering the skeletal remains of someone murdered by a killer called “The Toymaker”), but also she hasn’t been back since she transitioned into a woman. I like that this overlaps a horror trope with a common coming out experience, but again, other than many of the characters/actors being trans I don’t think this is primarily “about” trans issues, but maybe it’s just over my head like I SAW THE TV GLOW was. The credits do label it as “A Transgender Holiday Film by Alice Maio Mackay.” (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Alice Maio Mackay, Alison Star Locke, Anna Gunn, Annalise Basso, Australian cinema, Chrissy Metz, Christmas horror, Connor Paolo, Damien LeVeck, Janeane Garofalo, Jeremy Moineau, killer Santa, Linus Roache, Scout Taylor-Compton, Shannon Wells, trans, Vera Drew
Posted in Reviews, Horror | 1 Comment »
Thursday, December 19th, 2024
If you knew there was a new Hellboy movie this year – the fourth live action one – chances are you weren’t thrilled about that fact. For most people, it seems, HELLBOY was two movies directed by Guillermo Del Toro and starring Ron Perlman and since those guys aren’t making a third one that’s it, end of story, no further questions your honor.
That was the response in 2019 when there was a third one made on not much more than half the budget of HELLBOY II: THE GOLDEN ARMY, with a different tone, directed by Neil Marshall and starring David Harbour as Hellboy. The makeup just isn’t as good, it’s jokier than I wanted, but hell, it won me over. It’s less reverent than the Del Toros, more in the style of 2000s CG-driven studio b-movies, and even has Milla Jovovich as the villain. In some ways I thought it was more in the spirit of the comics by Mike Mignola than the Del Toro movies were, though with a whole bunch of different stories crammed into one movie, so it feels pretty hectic.
Before greenlighting HELLBOY: THE CROOKED MAN they must’ve checked around and found out I was the only person who liked the 2019 one. So they started over with a new Hellboy (Jack Kesy, DARK WEB: CICADA 3301), a new director (Brian Taylor, MOM AND DAD), and less than half the budget of the previous lower budgeted one. In the U.S. it went straight to V.O.D. with an ugly poster and publicity stills that made it look like a fan film.
(read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Adeline Rudolph, Anton Trendafilov, Brian Taylor, Christopher Golden, Hannah Margetson, Jack Kesy, Jefferson White, Joseph Marcell, Leah McNamara, Martin Bassindale, Mike Mignola, Suzanne Bertish, witches
Posted in Reviews, Comic strips/Super heroes, Horror | 21 Comments »
Tuesday, December 17th, 2024
DESPERATE LIVING (1977) is the fifth feature film from John Waters, the one he did before dipping his toe in the mainstream with POLYESTER. Its opening – not counting the credits sequence showing a fancy place setting where a (real) fried rat is served and (fake) eaten – introduces us to Baltimore socialite Peggy Gravel (Mink Stole, NEIGHBOR), returned early from the mental hospital. Her husband Bosley (George Stover, WRESTLEMASSACRE) insists she’ll be fine, but she’s immediately throwing manic fits. When a kid accidentally hits a baseball through her window, for example, she believes it’s an attempt on her life, and is sure to squeeze the maximum amount of drama from it.
As we laugh at Stole’s crazed rantings, we can see the trick of Waters’ distinct brand of outrageousness. In reality (or realism) this would be incredibly sad. This poor mentally ill woman is detached from reality and in constant fear and mania. But the purposely stiff style of most of the acting and dialogue creates a distance for us and an appreciation for the fact that everyone in this world is an absolute mess. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Cookie Mueller, Edith Massey, George Stover, John Waters, Liz Renay, Mink Stole, Susan Lowe
Posted in Reviews, Comedy/Laffs | 5 Comments »
Monday, December 16th, 2024
When I was slasher searching on Tubi in October I was surprised how many wrestling-themed horror movies I was coming across. And now I went looking for Christmas horror on Shudder and the first one I watched turned out to have a pro wrestler character in it. I guess the whole world is wrestling now anyway. We can’t escape it. At least it’s fun in movies.
THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT is a Canadian movie from 2023, and once I started watching it I understood why its plot description (“A lone man with the Christmas Spirit trapped in his head must kidnap a teenage girl on order to save Christmas”) was so vague. Its strength is that it’s odd and doesn’t really follow any of the usual formulas. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Alexander Nunez, Bennet De Brabandere, Brad Austin, Chris Handfield, Christian Potenza, Christmas, Christmas horror, Enzo Campa, Jacklyn Francis, Jordan Kronis, Matia Jackett, Nicolas Grimes, Samantha Espie, Tavaree Daniel-Simms, Zion Forrest Lee
Posted in Reviews, Horror | 6 Comments »
Thursday, December 12th, 2024
You know that guy, Henry Spencer (Jack Nance, GHOULIES)? Guy with the tall hair? Yeah, he works at a printing press I believe is what he said. Supposed to be very gifted. Anyway he knocked up his girlfriend Mary (Charlotte Stewart, Little House on the Prairie). Very awkward. Went to meet her family, it was like the quietest, saddest dinner party of all time. Darkest, too. Turn on some lights in there, people. They asked him if he’d do the honor of cutting the tiny little chickens they cooked and yes, I’d be honored, but also… is there some specific way you want me to do this? I could use some guidance here.
I don’t see him much, mostly stays in his cramped little apartment. Had a hard time sharing it with her and the baby, I tell ya. Baby’s a little lamb or maybe lamprey type of guy. Little crying worm head poking out of a ball of who knows what wrapped in bandages. Just lays on his little pillow all day. Doesn’t even have a crib. Good kid, though. Handsome little guy, in a way.
They don’t really talk. Not much to say. Henry just lays chest down on the bed staring at the radiator. Sometimes there’s a tiny lady in there (Laurel Near). Perky little thing, weird puffy cheeks, big forced smile. It looks like a stage inside there so she puts on a show. Shuffles from side to side, sings him a song about “In Heaven everything is fine.” (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Charlotte Stewart, David Lynch, Jack Fisk, Jack Nance, Judith Roberts
Posted in Reviews, I don't know | 25 Comments »
Wednesday, December 11th, 2024
FRANKIE FREAKO is the new one from director Steven Kostanski, who I started paying attention to when he did PSYCHO GOREMAN (2020). He’s Canadian and he’s part of this group called Astron-6 who also did MANBORG, THE VOID, LEPRECHAUN RETURNS and others. I’m gonna have to give those a shot. He was also prosthetic makeup effects lead for IN A VIOLENT NATURE, among other things. They got a fun scene going on up there, those Canadians.
This one is primarily the Astron-6 version of a li’l bastards movie like MUNCHIE or GHOULIES, but it’s also kind of a RISKY BUSINESS “party while the parents are away” movie, and also they work in some 976-EVIL – the kid whose parents are away summons a little guy called Frankie Freako by calling his phone line. Except it’s actually not a kid, it’s a sexually repressed adult man who does this while his wife is out of town on a business trip. The beginning part is lit like a noir-inspired erotic thriller and it plays like a dangerous foray into forbidden sexual desires or some shit. But it’s actually just funny puppets. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Adam Brooks, Astron-6, Blitz//Berlin, Conor Sweeney, Kristy Wordsworth, li'l bastards, Metthew Kennedy, puppets, Rich Evans, Steven Kostanski
Posted in Reviews, Comedy/Laffs | 14 Comments »
Tuesday, December 10th, 2024
THELMA (2024) is a cute little comedy about a 93 year old lady (June Squibb, NEBRASKA) spending a couple days feeling like her life is an action movie. She’s widowed and lives on her own, but her very nice twenty-four-year-old grandson Danny (Fred Hechinger, EIGHTH GRADE) visits often, drives her places, helps her with checking her email and things.
Then one day she gets scammed by somebody who calls her pretending to be Danny in trouble. In fact Danny is fine, but sleeping in and not answering his phone, so she puts the whole family in a panic, and by the time they figure out what happened she’s already mailed ten thousand dollars cash to a p.o. box. The police can’t do anything except tell her don’t worry, you’re not the first to fall for this, and apparently “Zuckenborg” can’t even do anything even though they might’ve gotten her information from social media. She specifically asked about that. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Clark Gregg, Fred Hechinger, Josh Margolin, June Squibb, Parker Posey, Richard Roundtree
Posted in Reviews, Comedy/Laffs | 9 Comments »
Monday, December 9th, 2024
Just when you thought it was safe to get back into the holiday spirit, the cozy, crackling fire is back. ADULT SWIM YULE LOG 2: BRANCHIN’ OUT is a sequel to the brilliant 2022 Christmas surprise ADULT SWIM YULE LOG. If you’ve never heard of that, it was a yule log video that aired without explanation at midnight on Adult Swim, now viewable on [HBO] Max or on a special edition blu-ray from Dekanalog. As you watch the fire in the fireplace you start to hear conversations in the cozy cabin where it takes place, and someone comes to the door and there’s a murder. It becomes a found footage horror movie slowly zooming out to show more of the cabin and eventually changing format as the story turns increasingly absurd and surreal.
And now, in secret as far as I know, writer/director Casper Kelly (Too Many Cooks, the Cheddar Goblin commercial in MANDY) has made a continuation with a totally different, but still very impressive, Christmas/horror/comedy conceit. It centers on part 1 character Zoe (Andrea Laing, Step Up: High Water), revealed to have survived the massacre at the cabin (though her fiance did not). She wakes up in a hospital, haunted by hallucinations of the ultimate villain of the first film – the cursed yule log that flies around bashing people to death. Her failure to adjust to the trauma ends up costing her her job, so her fun gay friend Jakester (Chase Steven Anderson, “Ticket Booth Operator,” THE COLOR PURPLE [2023]) convinces her they should go to Cancun to get away from it all. But their car breaks down at the exit to a picturesque little town called Mistletoe, in time for “the festival.” You know – the annual yule log festival. (read the rest of this shit…)
Tags: Adult Swim, Andrea Laing, Casper Kelly, Chase Steven Anderson, Christmas, Jesse Malinowski, Jonathan Snipes, Michael Shenefelt, Sharon Blackwood, Susan Savoie
Posted in Reviews, Comedy/Laffs, Horror | 7 Comments »
