I reviewed THE LAST BOY SCOUT (1991) once already, 15 years ago. Though I think I described some things about it pretty well, I was at somewhat of a snooty wiseass stage in my critic’s journey, and I was more dismissive of it than I should’ve been. Despite that I remembered it being a pretty good movie, and I’d been wanting to rewatch it for a while, so this last November, when BWolfe asked in the comments, “Can you re-review this? I feel like you’d give it a much better shake now,” I knew he was right.
(Bruce)
This Joel Silver production is a collaboration/clash between director Tony Scott (coming off of DAYS OF THUNDER) and screenwriter Shane Black (after being replaced on LETHAL WEAPON 2). Those guys making a Bruce Willis movie is about as all-star action as it got in 1991, and had Bruce and Silver known how the release of HUDSON HAWK was gonna go earlier in that year they would’ve been even more eager to sow they could still blow people through the back walls of theaters. (read the rest of this shit…)
RAMBO: FIRST BLOOD PART II was a phenomenon. And an unlikely one. It’s right there in the title: FIRST BLOOD PART II? How the hell do you do a FIRST BLOOD PART II?
Sure, the makers of FIRST BLOOD famously went with the ending where Rambo didn’t die, as he did in David Morrell’s book. But the character doesn’t exactly lend himself to a rousing second adventure. He wasn’t your typical action movie protagonist, a hero who comes along and saves the day. He was a drifter who was mistreated and fought back hard. Went on a rampage. Single-handedly waged a war against law enforcement (one guy died falling off a helicopter), wrecked a whole town, finally broke down about his experiences in the war and then turned himself in. A great movie because of its simple, character-driven story mechanisms, emotional center and excellent, largely internal and physical (and finally blubbering) performance by Sylvester Stallone.
So what’s Rambo gonna do, get out of prison, try to go straight, and get hassled by some other sheriff? Nope. They figured we got a perfect killing machine, let’s plug it in. Let him out for a dangerous mission, a one-man DIRTY DOZEN.
“There was some criticism that I made NASA look dumb in certain places. In fact if you heard some of these asteroid theories of what they are thinking of doing, it just sounds asinine.” –Michael Bay
ARMAGEDDON is Michael Bay’s third movie, but in some sense it’s the one where he revealed his true face to the world. There were plenty of examples of his style and character in BAD BOYS and THE ROCK, but it was ARMAGEDDON that first presented the full breadth of his trademarks: awesome awesome macho bros, pretty pretty sunsets, government employees portrayed as insufferable weiners even though they’re in the right, spinning cameras, haphazard editing all over the fucking place, chaotic mish-mashes of explosions and sparks and machinery and debris and smoke and crap, beautiful shots of people in various locations around the world, weirdly hateful characters presented as cutesy comic relief, an army of highly qualified writers seemingly locked in a cage and forced to duct tape a bunch of dumb ideas into the most unwieldy structure they can come up with that has a running time at least 30 minutes longer than the story has earned, and of course an ensemble of talented actors improvising jokes with no regard for any sort of desired rhythm or tone of storytelling. (read the rest of this shit…)
I meant to see this when it was in theaters in 1988, didn’t get around to it until now. It’s okay. Not worth that long of a wait, but luckily I did other stuff in between.
Treat Williams (THE SUBSTITUTE 2-4) and Joe Piscopo (Saturday Night Live cast, 1980-1984) play two 1980s Movie Cops. Treat is supposed to be the straight laced one, so he wears a suit. Piscopo is the wildman who wears a leather jacket and hits on every woman who appears on camera, because that’s always funny (see also: Jay Leno in COLLISION COURSE). This was after SNL when he got really into bodybuilding, so he also shows off his muscles alot. He’s kind of a cross between a wisecracking Bruce Willis type of character and a crazy Mel Gibson one. (read the rest of this shit…)
Two years ago, I saw and accidentally enjoyed the 2004 movie THE PUNISHER starring Thomas Jane. It was another attempt at a movie version of some Marvel Comics Book which had once been made by none other than Dolph Lundgren. After I saw that movie, I wrote a review (see below), then I looked into the eyes of the universe and I made a solemn vow that one day maybe I would see the Dolph Lundgren version, who knows.
Well today I saw Dolph’s version and I’m here to report that it’s okay. I liked Thomas’s version the best but this one definitely has its moments. Like the 2004 one, this is definitely more in the action movie/vigilante style than some kind of Batman or Superman deal. The main comic book element is that Punisher lives in the sewers and has tunnels to bring him everywhere. Also he has a wacky sidekick who is some kind of homeless guy who always claims to be a theater actor, and who always rhymes. (read the rest of this shit…)
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Recent commentary and jibber-jabber
Borg9 on War Machine (2026): “Some typos there, not all of them deliberate. Apologies.” Mar 24, 11:09
Borg9 on War Machine (2026): “I’ve largely forgotten this already even though I only watched it last week. This review seems more than fair, but…” Mar 24, 11:03
Petros MT on Protector: “Hey! Thank you for the responce. I also have seen “war machine”. Was the transformer part of the proud boys…” Mar 24, 05:00
Andrew on Scream (2022): “Was inspired to revisit this one recently, and while I was mostly reminded of how obnoxiously cloying I find the…” Mar 24, 04:39
The Allusionist on The Housemaid (2025): “As much as they apparently cut back the role of the gardener, they would have done better to leave the…” Mar 24, 01:17
Jhonny To The Line on Diablo (2025): “Agree with T-Drupe. This is the best film Scott Adkins has made. The reason being I cared what happened. By…” Mar 24, 00:22
Hostile18 on Bugonia: “I would like to see Yorgos Lanthimos direct a Count Yorga movie.” Mar 23, 23:10
VERN on Protector: “Oh, also I have bad news – my next review is gonna be WAR MACHINE. So you can imagine some…” Mar 23, 22:05
RRA on The Housemaid (2025): “Enjoyed this solid plotboiler BUT Seyfried was MVP. The sequel banking on SS, yeah not sure. BUT Dunst is doing…” Mar 23, 21:18
KayKay on The Housemaid (2025): ““Also, come on with the groundskeeper guy. I get that it’s a movie, I get that it’s the genre, I…” Mar 23, 20:27
KayKay on The Housemaid (2025): “Meh. As someone who tore through Freida McFadden’s fast‑paced novel on a flight, I figured I’d give the movie a…” Mar 23, 20:24
JTS on The Housemaid (2025): “I thought this one was pretty good. Very much in the same vein as A SIMPLE FAVOR. The ending was…” Mar 23, 18:39
VERN on Protector: “Yes you can watch movies about whatever you want – this is a positive review! But I would be a…” Mar 23, 18:09
The Allusionist on The Housemaid (2025): “I can’t quite envision a sequel that gets the whole band back together, but I can definitely see a series…” Mar 23, 17:43
RBatty024 on The Housemaid (2025): “It’s been fun to see Paul Feig to make that transition from comedies to trashy thrillers. This isn’t as good…” Mar 23, 17:30
I reviewed THE LAST BOY SCOUT (1991) once already, 15 years ago. Though I think I described some things about it pretty well, I was at somewhat of a snooty wiseass stage in my critic’s journey, and I was more dismissive of it than I should’ve been. Despite that I remembered it being a pretty good movie, and I’d been wanting to rewatch it for a while, so this last November, when BWolfe asked in the comments, “Can you re-review this? I feel like you’d give it a much better shake now,” I knew he was right.
May 22, 1985
Sure, the makers of 
July 1, 1998
ARMAGEDDON is Michael Bay’s third movie, but in some sense it’s the one where he revealed his true face to the world. There were plenty of examples of his style and character in BAD BOYS and 
Two years ago, I saw and accidentally enjoyed the 2004 movie 
