As you all know, I’ve been on Geocities since 1999. Over those almost ten years I’ve been ridiculed, interventioned and etc. by people who didn’t understand why I didn’t move to a grownup type websight with my own domain, like they would have in the 21st century. I always resisted because it made me laugh to see how shocked people were that Geocities still existed and that somebody would purposely still use it, and not be ashamed to put that URL in their highly acclaimed film book. It became kind of a test to see if people could see the substance of what I was writing about or if they would just ignore it because of the unprofessional surface. You all passed the test, good job everybody.
But for several days the Geocities page has been inaccessible, giving an “error 999” message. I tried to contact them over and over again and got the same useless form letter ten times before a lame threat to leave Geocities finally got a personalized response, which told me that actually it was running fine and I just wasn’t seeing it and should contact my ISP. But I did not have time to also contact the ISPs of the other computers I tried, the numerous people who emailed me about it or the Ain’t It Cool talkbackers I saw wondering if I was dead. I guess we should all scan our computers for spyware too, that could be the problem. Or maybe we should go to the Geocities help center and borrow their computers, theirs are apparently working.
So, fuck it, joke’s over, I will have a dot com now. Thank you to all the people over the years whose generous free hosting offers I turned down, and especially to Chris R. who actually registered the domain for me last summer. His kind act made going into exile a snap.
Anyway glad you found me here and please change links accordingly. Also, as long as I’ve made this change I’ve decided when I have time months from now I’m gonna try switching to a new blog-like interface. I won’t change what I’m doing here much but just make it more searchable and less crappy. So if anybody hates that idea or has any special requests let me know, outlawvern at hotmail dot com.
You take the “the”s out, the title becomes more aerodynamic. This unlikely THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS part 4 combines elements of the previous 3: the characters and tone of part 1, the video game plotting and drug kingpin bad guys of part 2, the director and improved visual style of part 3. Combining all the technologies they’ve developed into a new model.
Some terrible, fucked up news. Lou Perryman, who played Stretch’s faithful hick sidekick L.G. in TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE PART 2 died Thursday, murdered by some random scumbag. I feel a little weird because he died under such horrible circumstances and I only know who he is because of the spectacular way he was killed in the movie. But he wasn’t a horror guy – he just ended up in that one and POLTERGEIST because he worked with Tobe Hooper (he was assistant cameraman on the original TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE).
Most Americans, when they think of Australia they think of kangaroos and koalas and shit. Me, I think of high speed car chases and vicious (but wise) giant crocodiles. And I guess maybe occasionally I think of 6’5″ Seattle Storm center Lauren Jackson. But usually it’s the cars and crocodiles, because as you maybe noticed I’ve been watching the Australian films this last year or so – ROGUE, DARK AGE, ROAD GAMES, RAZORBACK, etc. I’ve never been there, but something about that place really appeals to me, and so do their movies, I’m not sure why. They seem to have an untapped (by me) reservoir of really good filmatists there who work in a style that appeals to me. Energetic but not frantic, stylish but still raw, serious but not pretentious, lots of car flips.
Seven strangers. One man connects them. Or some stupid bullshit like that, is what the commercials said. They had a hard time explaining what the hell this movie was supposed to be about, and didn’t make me curious to find out. That is, until somebody gave away the ending.
Not too long ago it was in the nerd-news that Samuel L. Jackson had signed on to play the character “Nick Fury” in as many as nine Marvel Comics movies. Some people said, “Well, that’s not surprising. Samuel L. Jackson will sign onto anything!” But that’s not really fair, they were probaly just actors who were bitter because they didn’t get the roles in THE SPIRIT, CLEANER, RULES OF ENGAGEMENT, S.W.A.T., SOUL MEN, JUMPER, HOME OF THE BRAVE, FREEDOMLAND, FARCE OF THE PENGUINS, BASIC, CHANGING LANES, SPHERE, LOADED WEAPON 1, etc.
Donny Yen plays Ip Man, the grand master martial artist who I guess was the first to openly teach the Wing Chun style of kung fu. If you’ve heard of him it’s probaly because he was Bruce Lee’s Wing Chun master, although that’s only mentioned in the text at the end of the movie.
In the second of Hong Kong director Tsui Hark’s surrealist double feature with collaborator Jean-Claude Van Damme (the first was DOUBLE TEAM), the eel really hits the ass. You probaly haven’t heard that saying before, because I just made it up, but it means “shit gets real weird” and it comes from the scene where Van Damme is pulling Rob Schneider in a rickshaw and Schneider starts whipping him with an eel while yelling “Move that beautiful ass!” That’s something most of us will only see in a handful of movies and TV shows within our lifetimes.
SPOILER ALERT !!
Nope, this is not a sequel or rebuttal to Walter Hill’s 
