"I take orders from the Octoboss."

The Super-Kumite Round 1, Bout 2 results


I’m pretty sure nobody’s reading these, but that’s okay because The Super-Kumite is an underground tournament. We don’t need the light of day shone on our activities. We do it all by torchlight.

But for the few of us in this elite circle of insiders it is time to announce the winner of the AMERICAN KICKBOXERS vs. THE WOMEN contest.This was a good matchup because both AMERICAN KICKBOXER 1 and PUSHED TO THE LIMIT were pretty ridiculous and outside of the mainstream. Both were more funny-stupid than actually-good, but I don’t mean that in a bad way because I enjoyed them both.

Of the two though there was one that had more of a unique feel, seemed a little more heartfelt and had more memorable quirks to it (as you can tell by my need to include so many screengrabs in the review), and that would be PUSHED TO THE LIMIT. So congratulations to The Women, who will be moving on to round 2 to face Team Bolo.

(Incidentally, I discovered afterwards that AMERICAN KICKBOXER 2 is not about a fighting tournament at all and would’ve had to be disqualified or replaced in round 2. That did not play a part in my decision, but luckily this result will make things easier.)



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18 Responses to “The Super-Kumite Round 1, Bout 2 results”

  1. But, would Pushed to the Limit still have one if it wasn’t partially based on your life, Vern?

  2. Because it was based on my life I actually was much harder on it, looking for authenticity, faithfulness to the original spirit, etc. Much like I would with a remake of a movie I was really attached to.

  3. Vern: good point.

    I’m loving the Super Kumite. Because of the “competitive” aspect, I find myself checking your site for updates even more often than usual. Of course, MOTFG is so much above the others to me that I feel like instead of being a competitor, it should be the neck-breaking evil behemoth champion.

  4. “I’m pretty sure nobody’s reading these, but that’s okay because The Super-Kumite is an underground tournament”.
    Just wanted to chime in and say that this is among the most enjoyable stuff I’ve read on your site in a long time. Love reading about these obscure items that are right up my alley. The only reason I’m not commenting in any of the threads is that I haven’t seen any of this stuff (except for the MORTAL KOMBAT thing…Good luck with that, when you get to it, fortunately it’s only 30 mins long. I can’t remember there being a tournament in it though!), and don’t have immediate access to it.

    You’re study of PUSHED TO THE LIMIT is the funniest film-related stuff I’ve read in ages.

  5. Republican Cloth Coat

    June 3rd, 2013 at 6:34 pm

    Looking at the line up, let me just say that if I were a betting man, then in my opinion my bet would be on Master of The Flying Guillotine to carry the day and triumph betwixt the torches.

  6. Mattman Begins

    June 3rd, 2013 at 8:14 pm

    We’re reading, and enjoying. PUSHED TO THE LIMIT adds some compelling details to your biography, Vern. I’m now trying to make the connection between your stint in the big house and your mastery of hide and seek. Did you know the latter prior to serving your time, or was hide and seek a skill you were introduced to and honed while imprisoned, like Malcolm X’s Nation Of Islam calling, or Conan the Barbarian’s expertise at walking around in a circle pushing a grindstone thing? The mysteries only get deeper.

  7. Dors this mean you will never see the other films on the losing teams? Also, watched Bloodfist. It is something else. Thay is my prediction to win mext round.

  8. Oh yeah, we’re totally reading this! It’s like the summer blockbuster of movie blog events

  9. Anything you write will be read by us Vern. I just think that many of us may not have seen the films and are just enjoying your articles.

  10. I’m reading these, and I am loving them. Thanks, Vern!

  11. Of course reading this! Shame though the swiss contender got eliminated so quickly!

  12. I’m reading and loving this. Good stuff. And I’ll order me a Kumite tank top.

  13. Like the psycho killer, when I have nothing to say my lips are sealed. However, I am reading these, and I am enjoying the tournament.

    Also, I always knew you’d use hide and seek to train your proteges Vern. How will have to remain one of my mysteries.

  14. The Original... Paul

    June 4th, 2013 at 4:17 pm

    Well, one of my possible winners advances to round two anyway.

    I see from the titles that Vern’s done a “Mortal Kombat” movie to start off the videogame category. If I could’ve chosen any one category that would definitely NOT win, that’d probably be it. So I’ll be interested to see what the review says. I’m off to read it now.

    My current winner prediction (having read only the first four reviews): Hong Kong maybe? We’ll see. I still fancy the women as a dark-horse contender. But could Bolo finally be getting the recognition he deserves? Soon we will all see (and some of us may profit.)

  15. I’m reading too and tempted to watch a few of these. But I’m losing track of how the brackets work. I guess this is why I don’t do sports. I get the winners face other winners but maybe you lost me at Team Bolo vs the girls. Was there more than one movie with fighting girls?

    I will go back to explaining the continuity of the FAST AND FURIOUS franchise where it’s safe.

  16. Fred, I added the big “TEAMS” graphic to the post, hopefully that will help. Since PUSHED TO THE LIMIT won this round its teammate ANGELFIST advances to round 2.

  17. Oh, so if AMERICAN KICKBOXER 1 had won it would have faced a different movie? I guess that’s why I’m Franchise Fred and not Tournament Topel.

  18. “I’m pretty sure nobody’s reading these”

    Just so you know, I’m waiting to read these when a bout is completed. Maybe a lot of people are doing that? Or waiting until a round is complete, or perhaps the whole tournament?

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