SUITABLE FLESH is the latest from Joe Lynch, a director who has a certain credibility in my book because his debut was a DTV sequel. I was mixed-positive on WRONG TURN 2: DEAD END (2007) and wrote some things in the review that I now consider out of line, but I definitely respect its joyful spirit toward sequelizing and in many ways outdoing a studio movie I really wasn’t that into. Since then Lynch has directed a comedy that got taken away from him, the Salma Hayek action vehicle EVERLY, the gory outbreak-in-an-office-building movie MAYHEM (which I liked but apparently didn’t review) and the Frank Grillo/Anthony Mackie car chase buddy movie POINT BLANK. But now he’s returned to horror with a sacred task: to manifest an unfinished project of the late great Stuart Gordon.
I didn’t realize it from the name, but it’s one of those unfulfilled ambitions we read about for years – here’s an example of Gordon talking it up while promoting STUCK in 2008, but using the title of the H.P. Lovecraft story it’s based on, “The Thing on the Doorstep.” The script is by Gordon’s regular collaborator Dennis Paoli (RE-ANIMATOR, FROM BEYOND, THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM, CASTLE FREAK, DAGON) and it’s produced by RE-ANIMATOR/FROM BEYOND/CASTLE FREAK star Barbara Crampton. (read the rest of this shit…)
This year I celebrated Halloween by taking the day off of work and watching a witch-themed triple feature. This is not something I ever thought I’d do, because I’ve always had that issue with historical witch movies where it kinda bothers me to pretend there’s a such thing as witches, since that’s the superstitious bullshit that real life tyrants used as an excuse to torture and murder many innocent people in this country and elsewhere. But there were a couple witch-related movies I’d been thinking I’d like to rewatch, and at the same time I’d been thinking about my late mother, who loved to dress as a witch every Halloween. She painted her face green and glued on a warty latex nose with spirit gum. Some of the younger kids in the neighborhood were terrified of her, but she got a kick out of it. So I dedicate this witch-a-thon to her.
I chose to view them in order of when they take place: first Rob Eggers’ THE WITCH (1630s), then George A. Romero’s SEASON OF THE WITCH (1970s), and finally Robert Zombie’s THE LORDS OF SALEM (twenty-teens). (read the rest of this shit…)
I didn’t even realize THE LORDS OF SALEM was coming out this week until somebody told me. I never saw an ad or saw the trailer play before another movie. When I saw the Anchor Bay logo at the beginning I thought, “That’s weird, why is the new Rob Zombie movie being distributed by the company that only does barely-released-or-advertised horror like HATCHET or BEHIND THE MASK?” After the movie was over it kinda made more sense.
There are many things I liked about this one. Oddly enough I like that it stars Zombie’s wife, Sheri Moon Zombie. She was a major character in all his other movies, but in this one she’s the center of the whole story and often alone on screen. I like that because it’s unusual to see an adult, tattooed, dreadlocked white lady as a lead. You see ’em around but they don’t usually make movies about them. Nice to have something different sometimes. (read the rest of this shit…)
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Glaive Robber on Eenie Meanie: “BTW, I thought this might be relevant to the interests of some of you… https://scottmendelson.substack.com/p/big-good-and-bad-feels-at-the-2025 I did not know this…” Aug 27, 21:40
Glaive Robber on Eenie Meanie: “I have to say, I was looking for something really specific from this movie — beautiful woman in car chases…” Aug 27, 21:24
Handsome Dan on Eenie Meanie: “As a Packer fan who still has the occasional nightmare about the 2014 NFC Championship game, this much unexpected Marshawn…” Aug 27, 13:17
Dtroyt on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): “Here in California, we tend to call everything liquor stores. But, if I remember correctly, in Michigan they do call…” Aug 27, 11:12
Simon Underwood on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): “I remember watching this on DVD rental and saying to my friend as they all gather on the ice in…” Aug 27, 01:11
CJ Holden on Nobody 2: “Haven’t seen it yet, but while looking up which RING OF FIRE cover was playing (I was hoping for the…” Aug 27, 00:00
VERN on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): “Comrade – Ah, I hadn’t thought about it being a regional term. Here our convenience stores do have liquor but…” Aug 26, 18:27
Skani on Nobody 2: “Treating this as a one-off lark / high-concept destination sequel, I thought this was a blast. Thoroughly disposable, but still…” Aug 26, 18:14
grimgrinningchris on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): “I remember one thing about this movie. Exactly one. That I watched it in full in the “cardio-theater” in my…” Aug 26, 16:21
MaggieMayPie on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): “There was a time in the distant past where I actually really liked Wahlberg. I think it was after the…” Aug 26, 16:13
Hammer Time on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): ““Somebody call 911 or whatever the number is for Cinemasins.” *chef’s kiss* I have a soft spot for action movies…” Aug 26, 15:32
Palermo on Four Brothers (20 years later revisit): “I somehow never saw this movie. I almost went to it on a date but I talked her into seeing…” Aug 26, 11:52