First of all thanks guys for making my first column a success, by reading it.
Also i’m sorry my sight has been offline I don’t know WHAT the fuck is wrong with geocities.
now every so often there is a movie that comes along that really hits a motherfucker right in the balls and says LOOK AT ME, MOTHERFUCKER – I AM A CLASSIC.
the motherfucker i’m talking about is of course fight club, the new movie by david fincher. david fincher for those of you who don’t know is a director of beer commercials from the ’80s. like beer commercials Fight club is a movie with assloads of style. unlike commercials, this is a movie about NOT buying products, or rather not buying into the idea that material objects are your life. the star is a guy by the name of “narrator” who is kind of a yuppie type dude working at a car company, wearing a tie, traveling around to take a look at burnt up cars.
by the way, don’t read this column if you haven’t seen fith club. id on’t want to ruin it for you. Just go to the bottom and order something from reel.com so a motherfucker can eat.
Now i don’t think i have to tell you this dude narrator is not happy, and that is why when his condo gets blown to shit, he decides to squat in the most fucked up house you ever saw. this is a piece of shit with no water, electricity, tv and falling apart. and narrator is happier than ever because when it comes down to it a nice condo is not worth a fucking penny compared to living life the way you want to.
actually iguess i don’t have to explain it because you guys have already seen it. sorry. So here is what I think.
This is fincher’s best shit. this david is one of the movie makers who storms hollywood like a true outlaw and uses these fuckers money to make a statement AGAINST the need for money. i hope this movie is a HUGE failure at the box office because that will be a statement in itself – who fucking cares? it’s the movie that counts not the money and those fat cats at 20th century should learn something from the movie. They need to learn to truly let the small stuff slide. FIGHT Club is a shank to capitalism, to materialism, to passively sitting back and not chasing your dream. did you really want to be marketing shitty movies trying to make money, or do you want to die knowing you made a GOOD FUCKING MOVIE like fight club? i wish i had fight club when i was wasting time in a fucking cage – would have got me off me ass and escaped! no just kidding guys.
Anyway this motherfucker is a Die hard for the ’90s in my opinion, and I ain’t fucking lying. Like die hard, it will have a great influence and inspiration on the people who see it. The most important scene to be frankly honest is when Tyler Durden holds a man at gunpoint as a “human sacrifice” and forces him to pursue his dream to become a veterinarian instead of keep working in this fucking “convenience” store.
Now let’s be clear i do NOT condone holding a man at gunpoint. If there’s one thing i learned in prison, well it’s how to make a shank, rape a guy, get high off of pepper or a couple other things. BUT, since prison i have come to the conclusion that holding a man at gunpoint is IN MY OPINION wrong.
BUT, a balls out movie needs balls out metaphors and this is one motherfucker of a fucking metaphor, in my opinion. in a way that gun is on YOUR head because you are forced to put yourself in the man’s sweaty shoes, asking yourself that question – is this what i want to do with my life? and for me personally, this only enforced my opinion that i want to become a Writer and no longer a criminal. what am i going to do if i die look back and say, “at least i didn’t get caught at first – i got some fucking money i did.” You can make enough money to buy a fucking gold plated hooker and a giant robot dick to stick in her, your still not going to be proud of yourself if your slinging crack or trading fucking stocks or some shit like that.
I haven’t seen a lot of this type of movie but i think i will try to look for them after this. David is a MASTER of the film language and he knows how to tell a story. the style is very audacious but it fits the story like a rubber. the camera flies through a can showing the corporate logos of crumpled garbage, through a man’s brain, whatever. the music is by the dust brothers which i think has something to do with pot.
now i know what some of you want to know – what did i think of the FIGHTING? well first of all i have heard that brad pitt is supposed to be a pussy and a pretty boy, let me say this is FUCKING BULLSHIT. i have seen this dude in a couple of movies recently and to be frankly honest he is quite good.
true romance – he is a stoner. small part, but good.
the twelve monkeys – a crazy motherfucker. VERY good.
seven – a cop. okay, but he was good in the part still.
So i do NOT see this pretty boy shit. i’m not saying he’s van damme, no, but he’s a good actor. In the fight scenes here is muscular, good moves, especially puking blood on a guy. now personally i DON’T think most mafia guys would fall for that one but i admire tyler for giving it a shot.
This movie is not all that violent as some fucking pantywaists are saying. i don’t watch a lot of movies but i have seen my share of fights in the yard and they are NO fucking picnic. you see a guy get his cheek bit off, stabbed in the dick, teeth broken on a wall. Some times a guy gets his head twisted around the wrong way or a compound fracture which is when the bone actually sticks out.
in fact one time i believe it was a fight between Sweet jimmy sinclair (pimp) and another dude. surprised i forgot this dude’s name because this was a good move. What he did, sweet jimmy broke the guy’s arm, the bone is sticking out. he lets out a loud scream of pain, then stabs sweet with the bone. OUCH!
So waht I’m saying no, the fights aren’t as brutal as real life BUT, they are well done and i was impressed. IN FACT i don’t want to sound like a pussy but the movie actually makes you not like to watch the fighting, even feel a little bad about it. i think the fighting is a metaphor for the extreme measures a dude must go into his dark side in order to shed his skin and become the guy he wants to be.
THAT SAID, it does make a pretty convincing argument for fighting. It has been a few weeks for me and i do think it would be interesting for two guys who are sober and don’t have any grudges, more like boxing or slam dancing in the ’70s.
as you know there is one bitch of a twist here and let me say that you pricks who say it is only a gimmick are WRONG. at first tyler durden is the dude we all want to be, who has no attachment to material items, no qualms about fucking shit up, bending the system over. THEN, we see that his great plan, like any great plan, devolves into more military style bullshit, mindless followers calling him “sir” and blowing shit up (although with style i must point out).
but when we realize that narrator IS tyler, we must see this in a different way. WE ALL have tyler durden in us. we can’t wait for him to bump into us on a plane and give us his card. we have to bring him out of ourselves. and then we must keep the little shit under control, before meat loaf with tits gets his head blown off (metaphor).
i like a movie like fight club because it gives you a lot to think about, to figure out for yourself. there is not one definite message and i have heard many people give different ideas of what it means, like really fucked up grafitti in a bathroom. as opposed to say men in black where everything is all cut and dry and ready for consumption.
but of all the movie gives you to think about i think the one thing i will come back to most is the scene early on where narrator complains about losing all his furniture, and tyler sarcastically says,”yeah, that really sucks man.” We as Humans tend to get too upset over things that really don’t matter. so what if you dented your car, forgot to watch felicity, caught having sex with underage girl, whatever. Life goes on. next time i’m pissed off ’cause some motherfucker won’t get me a job or looks at me wrong, i will remember that scene and it will put things in perspective. and some motherfucker will keep his ass. so in reality, fight club stops the violence and increases the peace.
P.S. I would like to thank jeff mccloud from rec.arts.movies.current-film who told me i should write about fight club. don’t get cocky motherfucker i was already planning on it. BUT i appreciate the suggestion. thanks bud
By the way if you want to help me improve my Writing please e-mail me and tell me what you think. If not then fuck you jack.
VERN has been reviewing movies since 1999 and is the author of the books SEAGALOGY: A STUDY OF THE ASS-KICKING FILMS OF STEVEN SEAGAL, YIPPEE KI-YAY MOVIEGOER!: WRITINGS ON BRUCE WILLIS, BADASS CINEMA AND OTHER IMPORTANT TOPICS and NIKETOWN: A NOVEL. His horror-action novel WORM ON A HOOK will arrive later this year.