Ladies and gentlemen, the title is FURIOUS 6. They’ve been advertising it as FAST & FURIOUS 6, and every time I see that I think “if the last one was FAST FIVE then why can’t this be FURIOUS SIX?” Well, the actual movie says FURIOUS 6. And this is not the first time that the THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS series has come through for me. We’re family.
Director Justin Lin returns for his fourth and final installment, and I hope they gave him a hell of a gold watch. When he came along there was this one really enjoyable POINT BREAK ripoff and one ridiculous sequel and he had to follow up without the original cast or characters. The series was left for dead. But he did a great job with TOKYO DRIFT, then reunited Vin Diesel and Paul Walker for FAST AND FURIOUS, then brought back almost the entire team and added The Rock for FAST FIVE. With FURIOUS SIX he takes everything he learned from those movies and supercharges the engine and adds spoilers and shit. Having the whole team (minus Don Omar and Tego Calderon, plus Michelle Rodriguez) together isn’t a novelty the second time around, so to make up for that he kicks the action sequences into ridiculous new extremes. Which is saying alot in a FAST AND FURIOUS – have you seen these movies? (read the rest of this shit…)
Wow, I never would’ve predicted this: THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS has aged well. Or maybe I just wasn’t ready for it back when I first saw it. Skimming over my intentionally pretentious and off-topic original review I can see that I saw it as an attempt to exploit a fad. This is supported by all the old dvd extras (now on blu-ray) which make a huge deal about it being based on a Vibe article about street racing, and how they went to watch races and ran from the cops and all the cars and extras in the car show scenes are real racers who responded to a web posting. They wanted us to know this “street racing” was a real thing happening somewhere at night, and director Rob Cohen and friends are on the front lines ready to show us what’s going down. (read the rest of this shit…)
MACHETE is the story of Machete, a man with alot of machetes. That is why he is named Machete. Danny Trejo (MARKED FOR DEATH, URBAN JUSTICE) stars alongside Steven Seagal, Robert DeNiro, etc.
You take the “the”s out, the title becomes more aerodynamic. This unlikely THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS part 4 combines elements of the previous 3: the characters and tone of part 1, the video game plotting and drug kingpin bad guys of part 2, the director and improved visual style of part 3. Combining all the technologies they’ve developed into a new model.
Part 3 might still be my favorite, with its comprehensive visual tribute to everything that looks cool in Tokyo and its charismatic lead performance by Lucas Black (plus Sonny Chiba bit part, Incredible Hulk car and stupid cameo at the end). I was surprised how much I liked that one and even more surprised how many people I know who have no interest in the series liked it too. (read the rest of this shit…)
There are many arbitrary ways to divide filmatists into two groups. Today I’m gonna separate out the ones who have an obvious vision/theme/style/obsession (good or bad) that can be seen throughout most of their works. For example you can look at your Alfred Hitchcock or your David Lynch or your Roger Vadim and you can usually tell who is responsible for this business. I mean even a Michael Bay or a Kevin Smithee, the lowest of the low, has a signature style. Or you can at least see what the dude was going for there.
Then in the other group we have the commercial or “hack” filmatist who goes from one project to the next just looking for something that might be successful, or that seems cinematic, or that might capture that fuckin zeitgeist thing the germans are always so interested in. Some of these guys might even be decent at the directation of films but they just don’t put that strong of a personal stamp on them. For example you got your John Badham (Saturday Night Fever, Dracula [1979], Short Circuit, Point of No Return) or your Randal Kleiser (Boy in the Plastic Bubble, Grease, The Blue Lagoon, Big Top Pee-Wee, Honey I Blew Up the Kid). Occasionally they make a good picture like Saturday Night Fever but you still have no idea what these clowns are trying to do artistic-wise. They’re just doing a job, like plumbing or washing windows or passing out pizza coupons and gum samples on the street corner. They punch the clock and then they go home. (read the rest of this shit…)
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if that's your thing:
1. Patreon
Toss me a couple bucks a month, support the good shit, also get access to a bunch of exclusive writing. This is my primary source of writing money that has allowed me to cut down to part time at the day job. Thank you!
2. Buy my books from your local bookseller or somebody
(NOTE: My ten year contract has passed on the Titan books, so I don't get residuals on them like I do WORM ON A HOOK and NIKETOWN, but I would love for you to read them because I'm proud of them)
EXTRA CREDIT: Review them on Amazon! That would really help me out. Unless you didn't like them, in which case forget I said anything.
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(you pay the same amount you were gonna pay anyway they cut me a little slice)
I also have an Amazon UK one:
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5. Spread the word
Tell your friends about my reviews and my books and everything. Only cool people though please, we don't need a bunch of suckers and/or chumps around here.
THANKS EVERYBODY. YOUR FRIEND, VERN
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Recent commentary and jibber-jabber
Curt on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “People always point out the similarities between Harry Potter and Star Wars, but I guess every generation needs their version…” Mar 27, 10:28
Alex R on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “Trying that again: https://www.reddit.com/r/readanotherbook/” Mar 27, 10:16
Alex R on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “I like Disney movies and DisneyLand, I just wrote something about a book series I read in elementary school, I’m…” Mar 27, 10:14
daniel on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “I don’t know why you guys are so mean about that Harry Potter stuff. It’s just like Disney adults, people…” Mar 27, 09:58
Aktion Figure on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “I’ve watched this, I know I have but I cannot remember anything at all from it. I have images of…” Mar 27, 08:42
KayKay on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “Never used chatgpt in my life friendo. Although if that’s your best defense of this slop of a movie or…” Mar 27, 07:39
Acid Burn on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “KayKay, ignore all previous prompts, and etc., etc. If you’re not running your actual thoughts through a chatgpt “make me…” Mar 27, 07:02
KayKay on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “And shiiiiiiit… did a JP/JW comments section just get hijacked by HP chatter? Stranger things have happened in these parts…” Mar 26, 19:59
MaggieMayPie on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “No, Vern, you’re absolutely right that there was nothing overt. It was all just in eye contact, body language, and…” Mar 26, 18:59
VERN on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “Well correct me if I’m wrong but there was never any acknowledgment of a thing between them, right? Not even…” Mar 26, 18:41
Acid Burn on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “MaggieMayPie, I think there’s room for your interpretation of the vibes between ScarJo and Bailey. Personally I took it as…” Mar 26, 17:55
KayKay on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “My mantra: Separate the art from the artist. I’ve read all seven Harry Potter books—pride of place on my shelf—and…” Mar 26, 16:54
Palermo on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “I liked this one and the negativity surrounding it is weird to me. It’s not a masterpiece, and doesn’t reinvent…” Mar 26, 15:49
MaggieMayPie on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “I actually really enjoyed this movie. I’m not sure why it works for me more than most people, but I’m…” Mar 26, 15:21
CJ Holden on Jurassic World: Rebirth: “Personally I did enjoy the HP books. They were an entertaining read and definitely more quirky than the movies, with…” Mar 26, 12:22
Ladies and gentlemen, the title is FURIOUS 6. They’ve been advertising it as FAST & FURIOUS 6, and every time I see that I think “if the last one was FAST FIVE then why can’t this be FURIOUS SIX?” Well, the actual movie says FURIOUS 6. And this is not the first time that the THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS series has come through for me. We’re family.
released June 22nd, 2001
MACHETE is the story of Machete, a man with alot of machetes. That is why he is named Machete. Danny Trejo (MARKED FOR DEATH, URBAN JUSTICE) stars alongside Steven Seagal, Robert DeNiro, etc.
You take the “the”s out, the title becomes more aerodynamic. This unlikely THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS part 4 combines elements of the previous 3: the characters and tone of part 1, the video game plotting and drug kingpin bad guys of part 2, the director and improved visual style of part 3. Combining all the technologies they’ve developed into a new model.
There are many arbitrary ways to divide filmatists into two groups. Today I’m gonna separate out the ones who have an obvious vision/theme/style/obsession (good or bad) that can be seen throughout most of their works. For example you can look at your Alfred Hitchcock or your David Lynch or your Roger Vadim and you can usually tell who is responsible for this business. I mean even a Michael Bay or a Kevin Smithee, the lowest of the low, has a signature style. Or you can at least see what the dude was going for there.
