Posts Tagged ‘Robert Aldrich’

The Dirty Dozen

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

tn_dirtydozenMan, it’s one of those concepts that’s too perfect to fuck up: twelve WWII era inmates of a military prison are sent on a dangerous mission to kill as many Nazi officers as they can. The Americans have this target, but they don’t want to waste good soldiers, so why not these lifers and death row cons, murderers and rapists? It’s kind of the same concept as “paint clothes.” You don’t paint the house in pants you’d wear to church, and you don’t want to waste your best soldiers on a suicide mission so you use these fuckos you got in storage. If they die – well, you weren’t planning on using them anyway. No loss.

For the cons it’s a good deal too. They get to go outside. If it’s true they like killing, here’s their chance for more. They get to postpone their executions, or kill some time before their executions. And if they do a good job and survive they might get pardoned, maybe, if fuckin Ernest Borgnine sees it in his heart. If they die in the line of duty, well, maybe they’d rather die that way than on a rope. (more…)

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The Longest Yard (1974)

Saturday, January 1st, 2005

Damn, I can’t believe I forgot about this one. They were showing it on cable and it is a real fitting coincidence that they happen to show it when the super bowl deal is coming up this sunday. But hell what the hell do i know about what is going on in the world of football these days, that is why it is more exciting for me to root for this movie where Burt Reynolds has to lead a team of inmates in a game against the guards.

Remember when Burt Reynolds was cool? He was just this cocky motherfucker doesn’t give a fuck. All he wants to do is get laid and be a smartass and back then you didn’t expect a big star to be so open about it. He also had that mustache but in this one he shaves it off as soon as he goes to the joint.

The part with the mustache is pretty great though. We open on Burt asleep in a big mansion. This real hot gal is trying to get him to do her, but he’s tired so he just pushes her off. Next thing you know she wants to break up, so he drives away in her car.

So there Burt’s drivin along drinkin a beer when the cops try to pull him over for stealing the car. He kind of shrugs and then leads em on a big chase. When he gets away by jumping a drawbridge backwards, he just laughs, gets out of the car, smokes a cigarette and then dumps it in the ocean. When the pigs finally track im down at a bar, what he does is pick a fight with them which, you know, he ends up in the joint. (more…)

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