“I’m Paul Barlow, and this is my daughter Jo.”

“Malone.”

“You got a first name?”

“Yeah.”

a new piece on STONE COLD

tn_stonecoldThose of you who participate in the “Twitter” brand social media platform might have seen an account called “One. Perfect. Shot.” It follows the simple idea of posting beautiful frames from favorite movies, so you can admire their composition and lighting and what not. For example here’s a nice one from today:


I didn’t know this at first, but the guy that does it is Geoff Todd, who was the editor over at Daily Grindhouse when I did a column there. He also collects them at a websight, oneperfectshotdb.com, complete with, like, articles and shit. He asked me to write some of those articles and shit, and he’s always been good to me, so what the hell. I will be writing one or two perfect essays a month over there.

Since most of his readers probly don’t know me from Adam and Steve I figured I should introduce myself with a movie that truly represented who I am and what I represent, not only as a writer but also as a human being here on this planet just trying to get by and travel this journey you know what I mean so obviously I wrote the only thing a man in that situation CAN write, a little piece called:

Strictly Bozness: The Fiery Majesty of ‘Stone Cold’

I know I’ve written about this movie a couple times before, but come on. It’s fucking STONE COLD, man. This won’t be the last time either. “Stricly Bozness,” by the way, is what I wanted to call my book on the films of Brian Bosworth before I determined that too many of them (including the barely aired TV show he starred in) were unavailable for me to do it. Maybe some day.

Anyway, check it out and feel free to comment over there so they know somebody gave a shit.

VERN has been reviewing movies since 1999 and is the author of the books SEAGALOGY: A STUDY OF THE ASS-KICKING FILMS OF STEVEN SEAGAL, YIPPEE KI-YAY MOVIEGOER!: WRITINGS ON BRUCE WILLIS, BADASS CINEMA AND OTHER IMPORTANT TOPICS and NIKETOWN: A NOVEL. His horror-action novel WORM ON A HOOK will arrive later this year.

This entry was posted on Monday, October 5th, 2015 at 8:51 pm and is filed under Action, Reviews. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

6 Responses to “a new piece on STONE COLD”

  1. One day STONE COLD will be rightfully seen as the classic that it is.

    Looking forward for more of your articles and shit. More Vern stuff is always a good thing.

  2. AnimalRamirez1976

    October 7th, 2015 at 8:56 pm

    OPS is an amazing web sight. Thank you for introducing it to me.

  3. Had no idea STONE COLD was on Blu-ray until now, and it’s about goddamn time too.

  4. Had no clue about the STONE COLD blu-ray either. Damn that took a long time ha ha.

    Finally some justice is done. The Boz’s glorious hair in 1080p.

    Best 90’s theatrical release to never get a sequel in my book.

  5. Just saw this on the new bluray..hadn’t seen it since 91 – and it’s fucking OTT demented, in the best possible way. I never really appreciated it back then cause this kind of shit was a staple in my vhs collection. No wink-wink irony or meta jokes, just the swagger of I Am Awesome Can You Dig It. Great article too Vern.

    I liked the exaggerated stunts, bikies doing full flips like circus performers. The dead bikie on his chopper funeral pyre. I also never knew a bullet could unlatch the trailer off of an 18 wheeler but fuck, might as well. Laughed at the massive wire braces on the teen girl hostage in the supermarket who they called tinsleteeth, then gave it a standing ovation in the end credits when they credited her as, yep, tinsleteeth. This movie believed in it’s awesomeness to the very end.

    Too bad we never got STONE COLD 2: ANGELS DON’T DIE.

  6. Once in a while I bring out my old as fuck region free dvdplayer (from 2000) that only on occasion can play a full movie without behaving like a stutterer. And that is to play STONE COLD and the UNDISPUTEDS.

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