Dolph Lundgren Headshot

Dolph Lundgren

26 Jibber-jabbers

  1. There are really good part of films.


  3. It’s called THE RUSSIAN SPECIALIST over here, and I could have sworn Vern reviewed it but I guess I’m mistaken. I definitely agree with the recommendation. It’s my favorite of Dolph’s directorial works.

  4. Who is going to review this? Actually never saw this before until now. Pretty much seals the case of Dolph as a true renaissance man


  5. So there are apparently photos and reports floating around, about Dolph shooting KINDERGARTEN COP 2. And while I’m not saying it is impossible that this is real, I more assume it’s a FUNNY OR DIE skit. (Especially because I have heard nothing about it and it’s not on imdb.)

  6. lol, would be funny if true – I could see that working but yeah it looks like its for some kind of sketch.

  7. Funny Or Die sketch is possible, but I’m assuming it’s real because a DTV remake or reboot was already reported before it was cast:


    The outlet that has the Dolph photos I find to be repugnant and will not click on to see if their information matches up. Do they mention Don Michael Paul or an Indian sidekick?

  8. Yeah I believe that’s a legit new KINDERGARTEN COP.

    I think he was perfect casting actually. He was the second go to foreign blonde 80’s action beefcake. It makes sense.

    I’ll check it out cause Dolph is actually a pretty funny guy. Universal is doing ok with these DTV franchise updates now that they don’t only focus on AMERICAN PIE spinoffs. CURSE OF CHUCKY was a nice surprise.

  9. I kinda missed that announcement then. Which is weird, considering how every nostalgia heavy remabooquel becomes big showbiz news and social media fodder these days.
    I’ve never heard of that sight that had the photos until this morning and didn’t take a closer look at it, but they claim that it IS for that sequel, including Don Michael Paul and Indian sidekick. (But they probably have nothing to back that claim up and just copy pasted all info about it from another website.)

  10. I hope they keep the original’s unique blend of adorable kids saying the darnedest things and brutal, gratuitous violence in the presence of said kids. Even when I was a child, I knew the tone of that movie was just insane. It’s got a cold-blooded murder complete with squibs to the chest in the first five minutes. Who the hell was that movie made for? Me, apparently. One of my favorite things in the world is that Arnold kills more people in KC than he does in all the Terminator sequels combined. He blows away the bad guy right in front of his own son, and then goes right back to the kindergarten class the next day like nothing ever happened. Hey, no big deal. No one’s traumatized or anything. Sometimes grownups need to light a motherfucker up, that’s all.

    also how is it cool that the old kindergarten teacher was just like totally fired for no reason and never mentioned again so this vicious killing machine could take her job even though he has no credentials whatsoever? Is there no teacher’s union in this town?

    So yeah, I’ma watch the fucking shit out of KINDERGARTEN COP: NOT A 2MOR. There’s questions I need answered.

  11. I still believe that this is a situation like back then, when Tara Reid talked about a sequel to THE BIG LEBOWSKI and then Funny Or Die decided to turn this either into one of their vids or she actually was talking about that skit all the time and the world ridiculed her for an out of context comment. I forgot what it was.

    Maybe it’s because I’m European, but I never really cared for the weird tonal shifts in KINDERGARTEN COP. I grew up with watching crime shows with my mutha, so seeing someone get murdered on screen was totally normal for me. It was only when they aired that movie a few years ago on Boomerang, that I thought: “Hey, wait a second. Is this really kid appropriate?”

    The one thing that pissed me off even back then, was when that kid climbed up that radio mast to attach his tinfoil lazer gun or whatever. Yeah, he was young and most likely emotionaly traumatized, but even with 9 or 10 or whenever I watched it for the first time, I was like: “Ugh, do adults filmmakers really think that we kids are THAT stupid to risk our life for some shitty fantasy?”

  12. If you want to know my beef with that sight find the post about the first cast photo of the new Ghostbusters. Unbelievable. Makes me question liking the same type of movies that guy likes. Might inspire a Vern Like It Is columns one of these days though.

  13. Mr. Majestyki – I too found the combination of action movie and kid’s comedy very strange when I saw KINDERGARTEN COP as a kid.

  14. Jesus fuck that site makes me want to light myself on fire. Just reading that drivel makes me feel worse about the world, my movie collection, and my genitals. I can’t abide this–I use this term hesitantly–idea that the only reason someone might want to tell a story about women is because they have an ulterior motive. It is taken as a given that women are inherently uninteresting unless they have their boobies out–liking boobies is super manly, the way infants are–so there must be an agenda. Never mind that the big comedies of the past few years have all been female-oriented, so the motive, as always, is money. Nope. Big Cootie must have gotten to these filmmakers. They’re taking kickbacks from the tampon lobbyists. It’s the only plausible explanation.

    I’m glad you’re here, Griff, because this is a nice lesson for you. This is kind of how you sound when you go off on “the feminists”: Like a toddler throwing a tantrum because Mommy let Lil Sis play with his Hot Wheels.

  15. I’m sorry if that was harsh, and I realize you haven’t said anything like that in a while so the drive-by snarking was probably out of line, but dammit, these fuckers do get my dander up.

  16. Crushinator Jones

    August 13th, 2015 at 3:33 pm

    I don’t think I’ve seen Griff say anything truly cringe-worthy for at least 3 months so he’s getting better. Let’s not give him shit – that’s the kind of thing that forces a relapse.

  17. You’re right. Sorry, Griff. Poor form to turn on one of our own. The enemy’s out there, man, out there!

  18. Do you care to link to the article in question? I have no idea what you’re talking about, but it sounds stupid, please don’t pin any of that on me.

    If some guy really thinks female centric comedies are some feminist conspiracy or something, well that’s ridiculous, of course.

  19. That’s pretty much it. I don’t think Vern wants to sully his sight with their shitty name, so just look for the cited source of the Kindergarten Cop sequel story on any article about it and you’ll find it. I went through the link on the AV Club.

  20. Ew. I barely started reading that vomitous dreck about GHOSTBUSTERS and had to stop for the sake of my sanity. But, yay for Dolph and KINDERGARTEN COP 2.

  21. grimgrinningchris

    August 13th, 2015 at 5:27 pm

    That fucking sight though… What the fuck?!?! Who is this asshole?!?!

  22. Urgh! I just about forgot about that article and now you guys are bringing the memories back for reading that preposterous pile of pitiful putrid nonsensical bullshit. Thanks.

  23. I took a snapshot of that Ghostbusters story at archive.today so they won’t be getting any clicks or advertising out of it. Have a look if you’re morbidly curious, and don’t forget the antibacterial soap on your way out.

  24. Well, that didn’t work. The link is archive.is/zHoXQ but you’ll have to cut and paste.

  25. Aside from anything else why is a website called “Manly Movies” getting up in arms about a reboot of a silly comedy which was kept alive through a variety of products and spin-offs aimed at pre-teens?

  26. “Manly Insecurities around Movies”” would be a more proper name for that shitty site.

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