"KEEP BUSTIN'."

Assassination of a High School President (2008) Poster

Assassination of a High School President

After the theft of copies of SAT exams from a principal’s office, teenage reporter Bobby Funke sets out to unmask the thief. Bobby prints an article fingering Class President Paul Moore as the thief, shredding the youth’s reputation. But as Bobby gets to know Paul’s girlfriend, Francesca, he comes to realize he was wrong about Paul, so he sets out to unmask the true culprit.

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tn_aoahspBruceIn ASSASSINATION OF A HIGH SCHOOL PRESIDENT Bruce plays Kirkpatrick, a grizzled Gulf War vet turned private high school principal who must use his elite combat skills and overcome great odds to retake the school when it comes under siege by an army of guerillas intent on murdering the student body president because they don’t like the theme for the homecoming dance.

That’s not true. I made up everything after the word “principal.” Bruce does play the principal and he does always talk about Iraq. He could almost be the same character from PLANET TERROR. He’s a hostile disciplinarian who’s driven into a fury when students chew gum. He also leads the school in a singalong of a patriotic song he wrote. But it’s not an action movie and he’s not the star. (read the rest of this shit…)

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