“I’m Paul Barlow, and this is my daughter Jo.”

“Malone.”

“You got a first name?”

“Yeah.”

Shout out to Clubside Chris

id4figure

Everyone please send some extra special good vibes in the direction of our friend Clubside Chris, the Technical Expert (see photo) of outlawvern.com. I’ve learned from social media that he’s in the hospital. It sounds like he’s gonna be okay, but he’s going through a huge ordeal and hopefully it won’t embarrass him if I take this opportunity to show some appreciation for all that he’s done for me.

If you don’t know the story, Clubside Chris is the guy who years ago decided to register outlawvern.com and give it to me because he couldn’t stand to see my important academic works sitting on a shitty Geocities sight. I actually turned him down because I had some notion about creating profound works that only the truly enlightened would be able to read because they would overlook that it looked like crap and was on a free sight that normal humans abandoned like 10 years earlier. A couple years after his kind offer my crappy sight went kaput and I contacted him (convinced he was offended that I turned him down before) and he was generous enough to help me out.

At my weirdo request he went through alot of trouble to create a WordPress template that would mimic the crappy look of my Geocities sight. And when I got sick of that (and after it possibly gave one poor guy a seizure) he made this nicer looking one we use today. He also made a forum after you guys kept requesting it. So Paul and alot of spambots owe him gratitude for that.

Chris is also the guy who convinced me to start posting my links on Twitter and Facebook. I thought the whole idea of Twitter was ridiculous, but he convinced me to give it a fair shot, and… whoops. Sometimes when I’m procrastinating from writing I wish I wasn’t so addicted to it, but it has really helped me to bring in more readers and stay in touch with people and stuff.

Chris continues to keep the sight operating and answer my ignorant questions when I have them. The most insane part of all is that he’s done it all for free, in fact at a loss. It’s incredible how much he’s done for me and for everyone who likes to read my reviews and for the community here. I also sometimes get the impression my politics can be offensive to him, and yet he’s never ditched me over it. He is a good guy. Thank you Chris.

VERN has been reviewing movies since 1999 and is the author of the books SEAGALOGY: A STUDY OF THE ASS-KICKING FILMS OF STEVEN SEAGAL, YIPPEE KI-YAY MOVIEGOER!: WRITINGS ON BRUCE WILLIS, BADASS CINEMA AND OTHER IMPORTANT TOPICS and NIKETOWN: A NOVEL. His horror-action novel WORM ON A HOOK will arrive later this year.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 11th, 2015 at 11:18 pm and is filed under Blog Post (short for weblog). You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

26 Responses to “Shout out to Clubside Chris”

  1. Get well Chris.

    We all appreciate your foresight and technical acumen.

  2. Wow. I didn’t realise Vern had his own version of Q Branch backing him up.

    Here’s to you Clubside Chris, your behind the scenes work is appreciated. Get well soon mate.

    A reader from Down under.

  3. Get well soon Chris!

  4. Get well soon, Chris!

  5. I hope shit isn’t too bad for you, Chris. Get well soon and once you have recovered, keep up the great work.

  6. Knox Harrington

    March 12th, 2015 at 4:06 am

    Hope you get well soon, Chris.

    On a lighter note, now might be a good time to show him some hospital slasher movies. You know, for encouragement.

  7. Best wishes to you, Chris. This sight and this community have become a big part of my life. Thanks for helping to make that happen for all of us. Hope you feel better soon.

  8. Feel better dude – obviously Vern needs ya, which means we all need ya.

  9. Here’s wishing you a quick recovery Clubside, and thank-you for everything you’ve done here for the lot of us.

  10. Chris, thank you for all you’ve done for this websight, and I hope you get well soon.

    I still exclusively use the Geocities-style, white-on-black version of Vern’s sight. It’s the best, and I thank Vern and Chris for keeping it around as an option.

  11. Best of luck to you, Chris — get well and get back here soon.

  12. Best wishes to Chris, get well soon pal.

  13. Chris – we fuckin need you, man. Get your arse back here in one piece, pronto.

  14. Chris is great! Liked him here and over on avclub, though his comments were few and far between.

    Best wishes.

  15. Hope you’re out of the hospital and back clubside quick. Your work is much appreciated, brother.

  16. The Black White Shadow

    March 12th, 2015 at 11:42 pm

    Get well soon, Chris, and thanks for everything you’ve done to make this one of my favorite places in the whole entire internet.

    Seriously; this sight and these people are the absolute best.

  17. Get well soon Chris!

  18. Chris, your hard work and contribution to this site is greatly appreciated, and I hope you get well soon.

  19. I had no idea how much we all owed Chris. Thanks, brother, and hang in there!

  20. grimgrinningchris

    March 14th, 2015 at 5:27 pm

    Get back on it, namesake. And kudos to Vern for the kudos and letting us assholes know what was going on behind the scenes.

  21. The Original Paul

    March 22nd, 2015 at 4:06 pm

    Sorry I didn’t notice this earlier. I can’t speak for the spambots, but I’m appreciative of Chris’ work sorting out the site and the forums.

    Hope you get well soon so you can start nuking those spammy bastards from orbit. Only way to be sure.

  22. I’ve often wondered about Chris (not knowing his name until now). If memory serves, Vern has alluded to him before as the guy who built all this, created an archive for the reviews, etc, and more than once I’ve thought, “What kind of a guy builds a website for someone else, just to help out? That can’t be the whole story. It’s good to know about him now, better to know that it IS the whole story, and best of all to have the opportunity to say thanks.

    Chris, if you’re reading this — thank you for all the work you’ve put into this sight. And I hope you feel better. Get well soon bud.

    D.

  23. Thanks so much Vern and everyone! I’m finally home and healing up hoping to get my prosthetic in about a month. I have some updates to the site to get done and of course am way behind on the reviews database. Right now my lair is tough to navigate but I’ve gotten good at the stairs to visit my dad so it won’t be long until I’m back to things downstairs as well.

    Hope everyone is having fun and of course I looke forward to more great writing from Vern!

  24. I am glad to hear you are doing well Chris.

  25. Glad to hear from you Chris! And feel free to take your sweet time on those updates. We’re just glad you’re around.

  26. Good to hear you are okay, Chris.

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